After teasing viewers with cello-stomachs and creepy doll faces, Ryan Murphy and Brad Falchuk’s FX series, “American Horror Story,” finally delivers a proper promo. And while it showcases much of the cast, things remain… cryptic.

The spot, dubbed “Family Portrait,” is definitely not something you’re likely to get from a Christmas photo shoot at Sears.

Jessica Lange walks around the house, while apparitions roam the halls and man bursts into flames and jumps up the chimney. Patriarch Dylan McDermott gets flirtatious with a maid, and a giant rubber-covered hand reaches down from the ceiling to play with Connie Britton‘s hair.

Hold up. We’re fully on board with “American Horror Story,” but if it ends up being a weekly dose of trauma for Britton (forever “Friday Night Lights” heroine Tami Taylor in our full hearts), we’ll have a bone to pick with misters Murphy and Falchuk.

Posted by:Mikey O'Connell