If you’ll remember, we’ve just wrapped the awesome 12 hours that is Group Night on “American Idol” and it’s time for the group members to actually do some singing, instead of huddling in the corner crying and eating their own hair.
Up first are The Betties, the group that was very divided about staying up vs. going to bed, plus there’s the plague going ’round. Steven Tyler remarks that they should’ve been “Betty and the Boops,” but I think they should’ve been “Betty and the Veronicas.” Anyway. They sing “Bills Bills Bills” and it’s awful. It’s an absolute trainwreck. There is no key, their moves are super awkward and then it just kind of ends. Oh my god, I wouldn’t put any of them through. But Jennifer and Carrie are put through and the rest aren’t.
Groovesauce (is that the name?) is next. At first, I thought it was “Groupsauce” and I was like – ew. Anyway, they do “Hold On, I’m Coming” and it’s really good. Just really polished all the way around, I’d send them all through. They do get a standing O from the judges and all are through.
Up next is the group with mean stage mom, 679. I hope her daughter gets cut just because the mom sucks. Don’t reward that behavior. Anyway, they do “Bills Bills Bills” too and the only ones really worth a darn are Shannon Magrane and Joshua Ledet. I honestly can’t believe a group would pick this song – it’s really hard to do as a group. And then everyone makes it except Kyle. And of course, now stage mom is fake nice to him. I would’ve liked to see how ugly she would’ve gotten if he’d made it and Brielle had been cut.
Now we have group Plague, with Amy from the woods. As they are heading for the stage, Jacquie faints, but she decides to muscle through and perform. They sing “More Than a Feeling” and Dustin forgets the words right out of the gate, then Amy does too. Oh my god, you dummies. Know the freakin’ words! Also, are you not familiar with this song?! How? Mathenee does OK, but he’s very shouty. Sick Jacquie does her best, but honestly – that was pretty awful, all the way around. Only Mathenee makes it through.
There is now a montage of people forgetting the words, which is always pretty hilarious. Seriously, guys. How hard it this?! And these are songs everybody should know! Good grief.
The Mean Cop group is next. I hope that girl gets cut just for being horrible. They sing “Stuck Like Glue” and it’s super boring. Just – boring. Nothing interesting. Except that Alisha the cop bops around like a lunatic and is kind of terrible. They all get cut. Heh!
More fainting. A girl in the group with Johnny the singing waiter passes out. They call themselves Area 451 – is that like aliens who burn books?
But now we have group Hollywood Five doing “Mercy” and it’s really good. They even use stand-up microphones, that’s awesome. They all advance.
Area 451 gets on stage and Amani the fainting girl thinks she’s going to go on stage with them. They sing “Broken Strings” and it starts off really weak and doesn’t get much better, then Amani passes out again.
In a rather hilarious little moment, Seacrest runs on stage like a effing EMT (he’s a hero) and Johnny the singing waiter KEEPS SINGING while Amani, like, has a seizure on the floor. Seriously, dude? The judges wonder if it’s nerves – like, it’s not nerves. She needs to go the hospital. The judges cut everybody but the singing waiter. Must be because he powered through in the face of an emergency. Clearly he wants this, no matter WHO passes out.
Montage of people getting cut. Nobody that I’m really crying about.
The final group is MIT (or The Awkward Bossy Cowboy group). In the pre-performance confessional booth, Richie takes a moment to speak alone to the camera, talking about how he’s compromising and gets all up on his self-righteous little horse. Ugh, he is the worst.
They sing “Broken Strings” too and everybody does OK (except Richie, he’s a little rough). The backup dancing and vocals are pretty lacking, but the solos should save them. And then they all advance.
Now it’s time for more solos. They take time to jam with Steven Tyler and Randy Jackson first, though, and that’s pretty awesome. How cool would it be to do that? Anyway, there are 98 contestants left.
Joshua Ledet does a really lovely job on “Jar of Hearts,” particularly on the chorus.
Then last year’s also-ran Colton Dixon takes on “What About Now” and it’s pretty solid, though his skunk-like hair and skinny tie make me want to flick him on the ear.
Phil Phillips does his Dave Matthews best on “Wicked Game” – it’s almost unrecognizable, but in a good way.
On “Georgia on My Mind,” Jen Hirsh goes throwback. It’s a little self-indulgent for my taste, but she pulls it out at the end.
Creighton Fraker, who looks like he could be a Patient of the Week on “House,” does alright on “What a Wonderful World.” It’s a little too big for me. I like that song quieter, but that’s just personal taste.
Reed Grimm has to work with the band for 30 minutes because he’d been planning to sing a capella, but he’s not allowed to now. It’s weird that they didn’t make that clear. The vocal coach he works with is Katharine McPhee’s mom, just in case anybody was wondering. Reed’s spastic personality won’t let him focus and Stage Mom McPhee is not having any of it.
Meanwhile, Shannon Magrane sings “What a Wonderful World” and I like this version better than Creighton’s, but they were both good.
Back with Reed – he’s like freaking out about the entire experience, or something. And calls his mom. Then he comes running to the auditorium and says he’s going to play the drums while he sings. Um, okey dokey. He does “Georgia On My Mind” and goes to his weird savant place and it’s pretty great.
Adam “White Chocolate” Brock tears up “Georgia.” It’s OK, though I also kind of like this song a little quieter too.
Rooms of Doom
The judges deliberate and then the Idol hopefuls are split into four Rooms of Doom. In Room 1, we have Erika Van Pelt, Adam Brock, Joshue Ledet, Creighton Fraker, Jen Hirsh and Hallie Day. Room 2 has Phil Phillips, Eben Franckewitz, Skylar Laine and Shannon Magrane. Room 3 has Rachelle Lamb, Britney Kerr, Jennifer Mulsh and some other guy. And Room 4 has Stephanie Renee, Baylie Brown, Brittany Kellog and Angie Zeiderman.
After learning that, I think the room I can confidently say is cut is Room 3. If they are cutting two rooms, Room 4 is also gone (though that’s a shame about Baylie Brown, but she’s also been kind of absent since her initial audition).
The judges then keep rooms 1 and 2 – yeah, no surprises there. They then cut room 3 – nice use of “Mad World.” And then room 4 is through too. Cool, I was right.
Come back tomorrow for the performance round in Las Vegas.