caleb joey big brother 16 'Big Brother 16' premiere night 2: Duo HOHs, Team America's player revealedJulie Chen welcomes us to the second night of the “Big Brother 16” premiere, looking even more fetching for night two than she did during night one. After some previouslies, we get down to business.

The New Houseguests

The next eight houseguests are introduced and it’s interesting that Caleb refers to himself as “metrosexual,” since he’s already the center of a racist/homophobic controversy. Out of these eight hamsters, Zach is far and away my favorite. He seems pretty bro-tastic at first, but he’s actually a fan of the show, funny and very likable. He could be a contender. Also possible contenders — Derrick and Christine. Keep your eyes on them.

Two of the worst? Victoria and Brittany. They have no idea what is going on, they are total eye candy.

When they enter the house, it’s all smiles and hugs at first. Caleb starts eying Amber, Frankie and Victoria are immediate BFFs and Jocasta and Christine are looking for women to share beds with (because they’re married). But it does not go unnoticed by Derrick, Caleb and Zach that the first eight HGs have had time to bond and it’s sort of an us-versus-them thing.

I love that Joey loves Christine. Christine needs to be brought into the all-girl alliance. I also like Derrick’s take that he’s back undercover, only now it’s in the “Big Brother” house. That’s a great way to look at it.

Hilariously, Frankie says Caleb is “going to be a problem” because he’s probably super conservative and won’t “get” Frankie. *snort* It’ll be interesting to see how that unfolds, having seen what we’ve all seen on Caleb’s Instagram account.

But either way, the Frankie/Victoria BFF thing is immediately annoying the crap out of me and needs to stop. Frankie wants Victoria to win the other HOH. Ugh, no. Noooooo. No.

Meanwhile, Paola and Caleb shoot the breeze and he says that he reads people “so well.” Hmmm. But wait, stop, because Donny can imitate a cricket. Like, exactly imitate a cricket sound. That is the most random thing, but also, Donny is playing the smartest game right now. He’s completely non-threatening and being extremely funny and likable. Man, I misjudged him. I thought everybody would think he was just really weird. 

Speaking of weird, Zach is being incredibly abrasive, as Hayden says, and borderline rude to Frankie. Dude, stop. What is wrong with you? I liked you so much on press day, why are you acting like this? Stop, Zach. You are going out first if you keep this up and you’re also making yourself look like a giant a-hole.

The Second HOH Competition, or The Nice-Butt Rotisserie

It’s time to roast some houseguests on a spit. Excellent. Julie informs the HGs that there are going to be two Heads of Household, but by week’s end, only one of them will be left in power. But first, we have to crown the second HOH.

Victoria falls off first (ha!), so there go those plans. Brittany, Jocasta and Christine are the next ones to go, which is not surprising — it’s a big upper-body strength competition and that does not favor the ladies. Zach drops next, followed by Derrick (who has kind of thrown the competition), so that leaves Hayden and Caleb.

Everyone is surprised by Hayden, but not Caleb, since Caleb is a beast — a beast who lets go with one hand and one leg to do some dance moves. Ugh.

Afterwards, Julie informs the HGs that four people will be on the block (at least initially) and then the new “Battle of the Block” competition that pits the nominees against one another in teams of two. The two nominees that win will be safe but will also de-throne the HOH who nominated them, so that HOH could be put on the block after the Power of Veto competition. Nice.

Team America ([bleep] yeah!)

Time to find out the identity of the first member of the secret three-person alliance. The houseguest who received the most votes from America is … JOEY VAN PELT! YES! That is who I voted for. I’m super pumped about this.

Who else are you going to vote for, fans? I’m voting for Derrick. He and Joey will make a formidable pair.

Tune in here at Zap2it starting at 1 a.m. ET/10 p.m. PT for when the live feeds start. We’ll be live-blogging the action to tell you all about what’s happening in the house, or just sign up for the live feeds yourself so you don’t miss a minute.