How much do you hate Christopher Pelant right now? I mean, on a scale of 1 to Hitler, how are you feeling? Seriously, whatever anger toward Pelant (and elation at a seriously excellent episode) you feel after watching the “Bones” Season 8 finale, “The Secret in the Siege,” it’s probably not enough.
After all, Pelant has come between the happiness and long-awaited engagement of Booth and Brennan. There is no fate awful enough to match that crime.
[Insert cussing here] Pelant!
It was obvious that something had to go wrong between Booth (David Boreanaz) and Brennan (Emily Deschanel) before Season 8 of “Bones” came to an end. No couple gets to have a happy engagement (with beef jerky!) at roughly the half-hour mark of a season finale without bad stuff coming later.
For awhile, we thought Pelant (Andrew Leeds) might kill one of our lovebirds. Then, it looked like Sweets (John Francis Daley) would be the heartbreak that derailed all hope for happiness. But “Bones” could never be that simple. Instead, Pelant let his murderous proxy take a nasty fall after Booth saved the day.
Then Pelant took out all his anger on Booth, telling the once-happy man that he cannot marry Brennan unless Booth is willing to let innocents die as a result. The engagement ends with Booth’s heartbreak and Brennan’s private tears.
Okay, how do we get past this and get ourselves a wedding?
Obviously, Pelant can’t win in the long run. An evil, sadistic, half-faced jerk like that is not allowed to win in a TV world like that of “Bones.” When not even the conventions of television romance could keep Booth and Brennan apart for more than six years, how can Pelant compare?
He can’t. The man has to die. Preferably horribly.
There is a distinct possibility that the Powers-That-Be-Behind-“Bones” want to keep this villain and his dastardly deeds going through the “Bones” series finale, whenever that happens. That could be what we will have to survive to get our happy ending.
Or not. “Bones” has a strong history of big and game-changing season premieres, not just season finales. Maybe if the writers have a summer to think over their sins, we will get the chance to punish Pelant as soon as the show returns for Season 9.
Oh right, there was a case.
Other than Pelant’s use of the case to ruin everything awesome and good that could ever exist, there may be a few things to mention. Basically, the murders were committed by the daughter of a dead FBI agent. Pelant had manipulated the poor girl into thinking that her slain father was reaching out from the grave to gain vengeance for his death.
Because the death occurred as part of an FBI raid on a religious compound, the Jeffersonian and FBI are spinning their wheels for awhile, looking for compound survivors at first. We probably should have figured it all out when a pretty, young girl identified a shooter who was easily identified as such a survivor.
It was instead the pretty, young girl who did the killing. That’s actually a pretty good twist. Bravo, “Bones”!
But that’s all the bravo you’re getting, “Bones”
I mean, we didn’t get an engagement! No matter how many exceptionally great episodes we get after this incredible finale, there will be no more cheers for “Bones” until this show rectifies the Pelant situation! You have been warned, television program that really doesn’t care what I think. You have been warned.
Pelant has to go.
On a happier note, people say awesome things on “Bones”
Lest anyone think the author of this article didn’t totally love the “Bones” Season 8 finale, here are many really cool, funny and emotional things said during “The Secret in the Siege.”
“I love you, Booth. Isn’t that enough?” — Brennan
“Maybe somebody’s just finishing off what he started 10 years ago.” — Hodgins
“You crossed a line when you shot me, Agent Booth. I thought we were working so well together. I never did anything to hurt you guys!” — Pelant
“You think this is a game?” — Booth
“Of course. And now the rules have changed.” — Pelant
“You are not allowed to die. Do you understand?” — Brennan
“He has no one else in his life except us.” — Sweets
“I want you to be happy. That’s all I want!” — Brennan, about beef jerky and Booth
“The point is, I want to marry you. Will you marry me, Booth?” — Brennan
“All this just made me see things more clearly. I love you. I want you to be my husband. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Say something!” — Brennan
“Yes. Of course, yes.” — Booth
“That’s wonderful news! Odd timing, but wonderful.” — Cam
“That’s it for the marriage thing?” — Angela
“You expected more?” — Cam
“Why are you smiling? This is not appropriate.” — Sweets to a newly engaged Booth
“BOOTH DECOY TARGET SWEETS” — message sent from Pelant to the shooter
“Sweets does not die today!” — Booth
“You hear that Sweetie-Bird, you’re the man.” — Caroline
“I do. I always make the decisions.” — Pelant
“I know you could never trade five innocent lives for your own happiness.” — Pelant
“I don’t understand why all these women are wearing white dresses. There’s no way they’re all virgins.” — Brennan
“I don’t think we should do it. I should’ve thought this through before.” — Booth
“But this is what you wanted.” — Brennan
“But you didn’t.” — Booth
“But I do now. I love you, and I want to marry you!” — Brennan
“Because you’ve been under so much pressure. I mean, that’s really what’s going on here. Like you said, it’s just a piece of paper. What we have already is enough.” — Booth
“You’re right. You’re right. It’s been a stressful time. And I’m impressed that you’re finally seeing things from my perspective.” — Brennan
“Right.” — Booth
“Bones, we’re okay, right?” — Booth
“Right.” — Brennan, lying