Season’s greetings, TV nerds! Today is your holy day — it is Dec. 23, also known as Festivus, the holiday made famous in a 1997 “Seinfeld” episode. The holiday was made up by “Seinfeld” writer Dan O’Keefe‘s father, and was then immortalized in TV history in “The Strike.”
At Zap2it, we’ve already erected our aluminum Festivus Pole and scheduled the traditional Feats of Strength for later, but we wanted to share the third tenet of the special day, the Airing of Grievances, with the Internet so that you might be able to join in.
Here are our TV-related complaints — and yes, there are some spoilers in here, so read at your own risk.
ABC, our grievance with you isn’t that you thought Rebel Wilson was a talent worthy of her own show. What we take issue with, however, is that you let that show be “Super Fun Night.” Never has a title stood in more opposition to what it represents than this clunker. And while we’re at it, Wilson, you’re on our list too. This is the best show you could write for yourself? Meh.
While we’re at it, ABC, we’re also not pleased that you canceled the baseball-themed “Back in the Game” so soon. James Caan and Maggie Lawson are proven talents, and their performances — collectively and individually — as a long-estranged, reunited father and daughter were starting to hit their stride just when the network pulled the plug. Foul!
OK, FOX, we know you have reasons for wanting to continue doing business with Seth MacFarlane. But even the most bankable creators misfire sometimes, and “Dads” was a big one. Yet you refused to see it, even trying to turn critical revulsion into a marketing tool. How’d that go? The rest of your comedies are all pretty good. Why you insist on hanging onto this one is a little bit mystifying.
“Homeland” went through many twists and turns during its third season, which built up to one big moment: the death of Brody (Damian Lewis). The only problem? Brody should have died long ago, meaning that dedicating an entire season to this drama felt drawn out, and left the Showtime drama on a note that felt a lot like a series finale.
CBS, your turn: Your drama “Hostages” was one of the most promising pilots of the season. How could you let it get so soapy and inane? So much wasted potential (and what a killer cast, too).
Everyone loves “Project Runway,” but maybe not as much after the 85th cycle of the year. Lifetime, we know you’re proud of the show, but can we try not milking that thing to death?
Speaking of milking things to death: AMC, we still love “Mad Men” and we’re sad to see it go too. But splitting the final season into two parts? Come on. Just let it go.
Hey TV Academy: There’s a lot of good television out there. We know. But the fact that you overlooked the supremely talented Tatiana Maslany, who plays six completely distinct, nuanced characters on BBC America’s “Orphan Black” when you were deciding which actresses to nominate for the Emmy Awards is criminal. You better rectify this egregious oversight in 2014.
Fine, killing Tara on “Sons of Anarchy” was done to service the story and made Gemma even more of a villain. But did you really have to kill her? She was on the path to redemption and then it just ended. Now her kids don’t have a mom. Are you proud of yourself, Kurt Sutter?
Add your grievances in the comments, and Happy Festivus, one and all.