real housewives new jersey recap bravo danielle presses charges 'Real Housewives of New Jersey': Danielle can't weave it beIn this episode of “The Real Housewives of New Jersey,” the cast deals with the ramifications of “weave-gate” and Albie gets closure on his school problems.

Girl fight
We start the episode with both Teresa and Danielle’s kids being taught to defend themselves. The difference in the scenes? Joe takes his daughters and it’s clearly a fun bonding activity for him and his daughters. For Danielle, it was a training in defending herself against further “attacks” from Jacqueline and Teresa. Her daughters just so happen to be there to pick up some pointers and roll their eyes at their overly paranoid mother as she imagines hitting Jacqueline and Teresa. To be honest, it was more delusional than scary until Danielle started talking about hits to the head – the kind that cause paralysis. Now, that was frightening.

Jacqueline goes over to Kim G.’s house to talk about the other night. It’s clear that Kim believes that Teresa should have walked away after Danielle told her not to call her “honey.” Though, I’ve already decided that, “Is Bitch better?” should go into the trashtastic hall of fame. I can never tell what Kim’s reason is for being around. I think it’s just to stir up trouble, which she does when she tells Jacqueline that basically what Ashley did was assault. Jacqueline didn’t disagree. Part of me thinks that Jacqueline went over to Kim’s, so that she can feel out the situation and knowing Kim will probably tell Danielle, she was hoping that her being contrite about Ashley may save her from a trip to court.

real housewives new jersey albie caroline manzo 'Real Housewives of New Jersey': Danielle can't weave it beCaroline’s brood
Caroline just loves her kids around, but she knows that they’re growing up and don’t need her as much. Most of all, right now she’s worried for Albie. He’s still waiting for a letter of transfer from his school that will allow him to waive the 2-year waiting period before applying to other law schools.

Later, the good news arrives. Albie got his letter that allows him to reapply for law school right away. He isn’t celebrating yet, but he’s ready to start applying to new schools. How sweet is that he’s considering his mother’s feelings regarding the fact that he may have to go out-of-state? OK, it’s a little bit mama’s boy of him, but when you consider the alternative, I prefer a mama’s boy.

real housewives new jersey recap kim g kim d 'Real Housewives of New Jersey': Danielle can't weave it beRespect the elderly
Teresa goes into Kim D’s store to apologize and guess who should come in? Kim G. It didn’t take long for her and Kim G. to start talking about the crazy night. Teresa makes it clear that she is not the kind of girl to back down if someone is trashing her. Kim G., on the other hand, says she sees kindness in Danielle. To that, Teresa points out that Jacqueline felt the same way and look what happened to her. She then admits that she felt bad that she had pushed Kim G. the other night, since she believes in respecting one’s elders. By the way, what crazy blue animal crawled onto Kim G. and died?

 Later at Ashley’s place, we join Ashley and her boyfriend as they’re discussing the hair yank. He wonders why Danielle has such a fascination with a young girl like Ashley and hopes that she got whatever it is she had for Danielle out of her system. I do believe that Ashley unnecessarily taunts Danielle, which is why she’s dealing with what she’s dealing with now. He hopes that they can finally just call it over.

Hidden assets
Hm, did the court have access to Bravo’s footage when it accused Teresa and her husband of hiding assets? We were introduced to his new projects, a pizzeria and an apartment building. She also mentions in her It was pretty funny (and a little bit sad) how Joe showed Teresa to their future home, a very compact apartment in their building.

Like attracts like
Danielle meets up with ex-felon Danny and his rubber-faced ex-felon friend, who never seems to know what to do with himself when the camera is on him. She has seen through Ashley’s actions and believes she’s just trying to get the Manzo/Laurita clan to accept her. And Danielle pegs the true fault for Ashley’s actions on Jacqueline.

I’m always fascinated with Danielle’s ability to speak of light and love, karma and other witchypoo concepts. But, when she says “like attracts like” in regards to Ashley and Jacqueline, it’s hard not to think, “Danielle, you’re sitting across from a failed actor turned ex-felon!”

Sue Jacqueline’s baby, sue
Danielle has decided to press charges against Ashley and she has gathered her lawyers and her gaggle of friends, including Kim G., in front of the courthouse. It’s crazy how she conducts the group as if she has become some great preacher of truth. I’m constantly amazed at how she transfers her own violent young adulthood on Ashley. Danielle, making an example of Ashley doesn’t somehow eclipse your own history. While I believe Ashley had no right to touch her, Danielle isn’t some kind of born again saint now.

Meanwhile, Caroline has found out that Danielle is pressing charges. Jacqueline and Ashley go to her home. The two women try to prepare Ashley for what may come. Then, Ashley wonders why Danielle won’t leave them alone. Jacqueline realizes she’s can’t expect Ashley to leave Danielle alone if she can’t. This is a good moment to point out a normal person’s reaction, by the way, folks. Normal people try to consider their own role in things that happen to them. The abnormal reaction is to show no self-reflection, i.e. Danielle’s inability to see how she plays into all this drama.

Busted up “Sex and City”
Kim G. runs over to Jacqueline’s place to, I don’t know, show off that she helped Danielle file charges against her daughter. Obviously, Jacqueline isn’t pleased by the fame whore pictures of Kim, Danielle and the two other gals in a “busted up ‘Sex and the City'” pose on the cover of several newspapers. Say it with me now, Caroline, Jacqueline you’re way too nice.

How are you feeling about Danielle’s decision to press charges against Ashley?

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Photo credit: Bravo

Posted by:Jethro Nededog