Yes, “Teen Wolf” fans. That happened. Allison Argent died at the end of “Insatiable.” It’s not a joke and there aren’t any take-backs.
There is also one episode left before the Season 3 finale. Think about that — and be afraid.
Spot the Stiles!
OK, so there are two Stileses now. That’s not confusing or anything. It’s especially confusing since one of the Stiles people is totally and completely evil, while the other is mostly just freaked out. Oh, and he’s dying of a dull ache and being really cold too.
Meanwhile, the nogitsune version of Stiles has bolted back to Eichen House with Lydia. His purpose? He mostly just wants to torment her for a fear-snack until the others show up to save the banshee. At that point, Evil Stiles has other, more nefarious plans.
Tough times for Twins
They have been de-flied, so the Twins aren’t evil zombies anymore. But that doesn’t mean life is getting any better for Aiden and Ethan. On their way to go help out, for example, both boys get shot by a rifle loaded with wolfsbane-laden bullets.
Those aren’t so much fun for werewolves — as you might recall from that time Crazy Aunt Kate Argent shot Derek with the same sort of bullet, back in Season 1.
Speaking of Derek, he does come to the Twins’ aid, but neither he nor Argent has the time and/or the expertise to fix them. Argent is pretty distracted too, what with something being odd about the shotgun shells and Allison being about to march to her doom.
Zero tolerance for bullies!
No one is able to get a clue about Lydia’s location, but then Stiles (the good one) realizes that crazy Meredith from Eichen House might know. But somehow or other, the nuthouse escapee has gone to Beacon Hills High School to sit in on an economics class and to pluck piano strings.
Meredith, it seems, is a banshee too. And she is the key to finding Lydia.
That will not happen if the orderlies have anything to say about it though. Three mean, tough guys show up and have the nerve to tease Coach Finstock before hunting down their prey. What jerks!
But Coach isn’t Coach for no reason. He’s a teacher now, and he can show orderlies a thing or two — especially when those orderlies aren’t very good at keeping hold of their tasers. Down with bullies! Woo!
This would all be great and lead straight to Lydia except for one thing: Lydia’s only message via Meredith is to stay away. She doesn’t want anyone coming to rescue her.
Your friends are all going to die … How about a board game?
Kira’s parents are legitimately infuriating people. And I don’t mean in a standard, teen-angst sort of way. No, the Yukimuras are the kind of people that might make you want to take that magically fixed samurai sword and lop off a parental head.
These scream-inducing people want to play Go with their daughter.
Understandably, Kira isn’t really down with the plan. She only puts up with even a short game because Noshiko insists that a) it’s the nogitsune’s game that Kira needs to play, and b) it’s all about strategy. All Kira seems to learn, though, is that Mom really doesn’t want the kids dealing with Evil Stiles.
That’s her deal. And she’s got the Oni to make it happen.
Turnabout is fair play
Noshiko probably should have left the nogitsune-defeating to the kids. Because all she manages to do is put everyone in even more danger than before. She has her super-strong Oni march straight into Eichen House and seek out Evil Stiles.
But that, you see, was the nogitsune’s plan all along. With Lydia to warn him of the Oni’s arrival, Evil Stiles has time to pull out and break a kitsune tail. Then he is able to take ownership of every single Oni in the place.
And you don’t want to hang out with Oni controlled by an evil trickster spirit.
No one is getting anywhere in defeating these Oni. Scott and Stiles aren’t even there for most of the fight, having gone to the basement to save Lydia. Kira is kicking a lot of Oni butt with her nerdy-cool shoes, but there’s no lasting effect. Isaac (only there to avoid homework anyway) ends up getting slashed over and over again. And Noshiko is busy hiding in the corner and being quite useless.
That just leaves Allison and her brand-new silver-tipped arrow.
It turns out that a silver arrow is just the thing if you want to vanquish an Oni. That, however, makes Allison a target, and it is never good to be the target of an Oni.
Allison learns that the hard way. An Oni sword hits home when the “Teen Wolf” warrior queen isn’t paying attention in that direction. Allison quickly collapses to the ground as the Oni (and Evil Stiles) disappear into the growing light.
But Scott catches her. Although nothing will ever be OK ever again, to Allison, this moment is “perfect”:
“I’m in the arms of the first person I ever loved. The first person I’ll ever love. I love you, Scott McCall. You have to tell my dad! You have to tell him …”
As the futile screams of a million shocked fans rise into the night, “Teen Wolf” ends its most devastating episode ever. Good night, Allison. And good luck evil beings of all sorts — you have pissed off a man named Chris Argent.
It’s going to be bad.