Who knew Quiznos was in the business of making TV-related viral videos? But here it is, the “House of Cards”“Game of Thrones” mash-up you never knew you wanted.

In the video, an actor playing Frank Underwood (who sounds remarkably like Kevin Spacey) walks around Westeros and takes out his enemies, with patented Underwoodian asides to the camera full of colorful (and nonsensical) bons mots like, “As we used to say in Gaffney, when your neighbor brings you rotten deer meat, make sure he takes the first bite of jerky.”

The way he says “khaleesi” is hilarious, as is the implication that Doug Stamper is his pet dragon (it’s funny because it’s true). And clearly the Quiznos filmmakers have read the books.

“Game of Thrones” Season 4 premieres Sunday, April 6 on HBO, and “House of Cards” returns with Season 3 on Netflix in early 2015.

Posted by:Andrea Reiher

TV critic by way of law school, Andrea Reiher enjoys everything from highbrow drama to clever comedy to the best reality TV has to offer. Her TV heroes include CJ Cregg, Spencer Hastings, Diane Lockhart, Juliet O'Hara and Buffy Summers. TV words to live by: "I'm a slayer, ask me how."