There is a grave matter of national concern affecting our country these days, and not a single one of the 2016 presidential candidates has bothered to address it. We’re speaking, of course, about the career of Nicolas Cage.
Following decades of Hollywood hits, the actor has spent the last half-decade treading water in one-word direct-to-video Redbox rentals (“Rage,” “Stolen,” “Outcast“) and roles passed over by Kirk Cameron (“Left Behind“). But no matter what you think of the Oscar winner’s acting chops, this much we can all agree on: The man was born to be a movie star, and we need him to stop fighting with Vince Neil and become one again.
From “Wild at Heart” to “Face/Off,” to “Leaving las Vegas” and “Moonstruck,” the guy has starred in more classics than many of today’s stars combined. Looking back on images of him throughout the years, here are 94 endearingly-crazypants photos that remind us of the reasons why Nicolas Cage is a national treasure.
He is delightfully strange
You know, not in a Joaquin Phoenix-should-we-be-concerned way, or a Gary Busey that-guy-is-too-far-gone-to-be-taken-seriously way, but in an endearing, crazy uncle kinda way. Do you have any uncomfortable-looking photos ops with Snoopy? Do you have a police mug shot with your eyes closed? That, my friend, is why you’re not a movie star.
We all know some of the delightfully animated facial expressions that Cage has at his disposal. On the red carpet, you never know which one he will unleash. At turns, he can look delighted, furious or just plain stalker-y. But one thing’s for sure: He’s never boring.
His mood ring
Yeah, we’re pretty sure he’s got one. Green means he’s happy, red seems to indicate that he’s considering another “Ghost Rider” sequel.
Like pal John Travolta, it is a fascinating thing to behold, and we’ll leave it at that. Is that last picture an audition to play Loki in the next “Avengers” film?
Let’s just say this: The guy never dresses boring.
His facial adornments
They say that any great actor is a chameleon — and Cage seems convinced that his facial hair is a key element to his disguise. At this point, it seems like the guy has tried everything except a Hitler mustache.
He hangs out with the most random people
Nicolas Kim Coppola is 52, which is old enough to know and respect folks like Cher and Sean Connery. He’s from a connected Hollywood family and went to Beverly Hills High School, which means he goes way back with folks like Charlie Sheen and Jim Carrey. He has eclectic tastes in music, which means he hangs out with folks like Debbie Harry, Axl Rose, The Cult and Rob Zombie.
On top of that, according to IMDb, he has now appeared in over 3 billion movies (we’re pretty sure we’re reading that correctly), which means that he has costarred with everybody except — um, wait a minute, is that Lionel Ritchie?
He’s a pointer
Much like Sylvester Stallone, Cage seems to have a go-to red carpet pose. While he might be a great movie star, he’d make a lousy politician, because every candidate knows that you never point directly at your audience but instead do that weird thumb-poking-out thing. Regardless, the point is that Nic Cage loves to point.
He has an ugly wax statue
Sure, all the major stars get a wax statue in their honor. But for some reason, Nicolas Cage’s essence seems impossible to capture in wax — how else could you describe the hideous aberration that Cage himself showed up to baptize? Look out Nic, it’s behind you!