I actually hate this theme but it's good for lots of laughing and snark. Hopefully we don't have anything quite as bad as "Love Child" from a few seasons ago.
Ryan Seacrest reminds us that two people are going home this week. It really is unfortunate that this coincides with Disco Week because good singers can notoriously tank on disco.
Lil Rounds, "I'm Every Woman" by Chaka Khan
Right from the get-go she sounds off-pitch to me. This is too big of a song for Lil. On the chorus, she barely sings. The background singers are totally carrying the song for her. She looks fabulous is a black one-piece pantsuit but the performance was really lacking for me. Randy says it sounded wild (and not in a good way) and goes back to asking what kind of artist Lil is going to be.
Kara says we've been waiting for her to sing Chaka Khan (we have?) but wonders if it was worth the wait. She also thinks it needed more "Lil" than "Chaka." Paula talks about how Lil has been sick and on complete vocal rest. Simon says this is the last week we're going to see her. Fingers crossed! Also, as Awesome Commenter Sissers has pointed out (and I meant to mention) Lil is shooting DAGGERS at the judges. I can't believe one of them didn't burst in flames with the looks she is giving them.
Kris Allen, "She Works Hard for the Money" by Donna Summer
Interesting choice. Hmmm. Seacrest spins it as "a song about a woman who has great work ethic," instead of "a song about a prostitute." Hee. Kris is taking us from bad disco to a cool acoustic guitar place and I like it. It gives the song a completely different feel and shows us *exactly* what Kris would do as an artist. Lil needs to take notes because that is *exactly* what she DID NOT do. Vocally, he isn't doing anything too crazy but it's a clean vocal with nice accompaniment. It also makes me a feel a lot more emotion for the subject of the song than Donna Summer's version. Nice.
Kara says his arrangement was a great risk and really paid off. Paula very astutely likens him to Santana, which might be the best comment she's made all season. She follows it by a pretty funny metaphor of men shopping in the women's department. Simon says complete polar opposite to Lil because it was original, well thought-out, and not karaoke. Randy says he's ready for the big time because he knows who he is. Yes.
**Side note: I can't get too upset about what is technically "disco" and what isn't because we don't know what songs the performers had to choose from. It's not their fault the songs we've heard so far were available, they have to pick what they feel they can perform well.**
Danny Gokey, "September" by Earth, Wind and Fire
I love this song, just for the record. EWF rocks my socks, y'all. Danny gets a little sharp on the verse at spots, but overall he actually sounds really good on this song. He also manages to make it sound distinctly "Danny" and not just an EWF copy. He grooves with the backup singers, which I like, and he finishes strong. Pretty good.
Randy was worried about the song choice but that Danny worked it out. Kara calls it solid, Paula liked his vocal agility and practically rushes the stage to make out with him (not really, but she calls his voice sexy). Simon liked it but didn't get a good "star power" vibe.
Allison Iraheta, "Hot Stuff" by Donna Summer
Allison slows down the beginning while languishing on the bright red steps and it's super-sultry. She also looks fabulous in a corset and sparkly mini skirt. She has totally changed the feel of the song to a cool rocker chick song and it works for me. She's also working the stage like a seasoned veteran, I think I just saw a body roll in there. Step back, Wild Child! That was 100% Allison and I liked it.
Randy didn't love the arrangement but says she's one of the best singers in the competition. Kara echoes his comments but she thought the vocals were still great. Paula liked the edginess and her authenticity to who she is as an artist. Simon says this isn't a great week for her theme-wise but he calls it "brilliant."
Adam Lambert, "If I Can't Have You" by Yvonne Elliman
Adam's wearing a black suit and looking very dapper tonight. Rowr! He starts off all slow and souful, it's very much "Tracks of My Tears" and "Mad World" esque. He sounds beautiful, but I actually hope he kicks it up on the chorus. Hmm. He keeps it slow and dramatic on the chorus, but he is just POURING the emotion into it. Wow. That actually made me shiver a little. Heartbreaking. Whoo. Very nicely done.
Randy says at this point all the contestants should be showing their musical range and that Adam is ready RIGHT NOW. Kara says "brilliant" and then seems to confuse Saturday Night Fever with Saturday Night Live. Paula's panties just burst into flames. Simon liked that it was original and calls the vocals "immaculate." During the phone number part, Seacrest says Adam turned Paula into a "pool of Abdul." That is… awesome and a little gross. I want to be BFF with Ryan Seacrest, guys.
Matt Giraud, "Stayin' Alive" by the Bee Gees
This is very much Justin-Timberlake-does-Disco but I really like it! I feel like Giraud is making good use of his save last week. He can't get the breath to do the complete chorus the way the Bee Gees did it, but who can? He also whips out some falsetto that is NOT bad [eyebrows raised]. Huh. Usually I don't like people futzing around with the classics, but I enjoyed this. I think Matt is safe this week, actually.
Randy says he can really sing. even though he didn't love the song. Kara says he brought disco back to the night and calls it solid. Paula says he picks songs like she bowls, sometimes gutterballs and sometimes strikes and tonight was a strike. Hahaha. Paula cracks me up sometimes. Simon didn't like it, which is unfortunate. He calls it desperate and unoriginal, which I take umbrage with because Matt *distinctly* didn't copycat the Bee Gees. Hmm.
Anoop Desai, "Dim All the Lights" by Donna Summer
Sorry guys, I am not a fan. This is horribly cheesy, from the light suit to the off-pitch vocals to the very abrupt ending, I am not a fan at all. Hmmm. That was the last performance? Weird. Ugh. At least we have 2 clear-cut people to send home.
Randy didn't love the arrangement, cites the corny factor but still says nice. Kara
liked the song choice and the beat. Paula says real men can wear pink. What does she do now that her panties are already gone from Adam's performance? Simon completely disagrees, calling it mediocre and his worst performance by a mile. YES! I thought I was crazy for a minute there.
Recap: Lil getting swallowed up by her song and the backup singers, Kris being the most pleasant surprise of the night, Danny doing his Danny thing, Allison sexing her Hot Stuff all over the stage (woo woo), Adam breaking my heart just a little, Matt R&Bing the ultimate disco song, and Anoop getting his cheese and Chester the Molester mustache all over everything.
Who should go home guys? I think it's pretty clearly Anoop and Lil, but do you guys agree?