You’ve had a couple episodes to see Howard Stern in action on “America’s Got Talent” – what do you think so far? We’ve actually been pleasantly surprised by him – he’s funny and entertaining, but not inappropriate or mean, so we think we’re on board with him as a choice.
Monday night (May 21), the auditions are still in New York City. We kick things off with The Flyte Cru, a trampoline dunk team.They’re fun to watch and have a couple neat tricks, but we aren’t sure where we see it going (and it seems like we’ve seen that all before). However, they’re good enough to go to Vegas and get another shot to show what they can do and the judges agree, though Howie does point out that they aren’t breaking new ground with their act.
Good Montage – an aerialist named Max, who is quite impressive to watch; The New York Irish Dance Company, which is a little creepy with their masks, but good dancers, an adorable young man named Jason, who is hell on the ol’ ivories.
Next we have one of those acts that (should) make us want to die from all the cuteness. It’s 7-year-old Mir Money frommmm west Philadelphia, born and raised, on the playground is where he spends most of his days…. ahem. Sorry. Mir Money “raps” and it’s pretty terrible. This is no SH-Boss Boys from last year. He’s an adorable little boy, but he really isn’t a good rapper, even for a little kid.
So, then, though – the show goes a little off the rails. Howard tries to talk to Mir and he’s very nice and Mir starts crying and the audience boos Howard. Um, it’s not Howard’s fault the kid kinda sucks. And while no one wants to make a 7-year-old cry, Mir is not very good and he doesn’t deserve to advance. Also, a kid who is going to be in show business has to have tougher skin than that. So audience, don’t boo Howard.
Nick Cannon giving the kid a pep talk is pretty adorable. Just another reason we heart Nick Cannon. Also, that debacle is on the producers – they should’ve seen that kid couldn’t cut the mustard and never put him on stage. Bad form, show.
Olate Dogs are next, which is an acrobatic dog act with some very, very cute pooches. Sharon Osbourne is naturally losing her mind. Seriously, this is pretty good, though. The one Labradoodle is very talented.
The next act is Horse, a man who repeatedly take shots to the junk in various ways. This is the dumbest thing we’ve ever seen, but Howard is laughing like a maniac. Sigh. Maybe it’s a guy thing? This is about as much of a talent as Professor Splash. Boooo. Next!
Bad Montage – some tweens who think they can play the drums and guitar; a Kiss wannabe playing guitar for a singer who is like if Skeletor and the Phantom of the Opera had a rock baby.
Those two bad bands lead into Wordspit, the Illest, an eight-piece band that does a weird hybrid of alternative/rock/rap. It’s not my cup of tea, but they aren’t not talented just because I don’t care for their music. The judges give them a chance to prove themselves in Vegas. They definitely need a different name, though.
Burton Crane is a 77-year-old stretched-Colonel-Sanders-looking guy who raps along with his Casio keyboard. His rap is “Whatcha Gonna Do” and it’s no “Pants on the Ground.” Meh. Pretty surprised nobody’s buzzed him yet.
The judges act like everybody’s going crazy for this song at home – we don’t actually suspect that’s true.