Last week, ‘America’s Next Top Model’ defied absolutely nobody’s expectations by sending home Katarzyna, the only remaining contestant with any actual potential for a modeling career. Apparently, in Miss Tyra’s world, having an attitude is more important than having a pretty face (DOMINIQUE.) Four girls – and one week – remain until the unveiling of America’s Next Saleisha!

Whitney reminds us all that, despite landing on the chopping block two weeks running, she’s still here. Oh, and hey, speaking of America’s Next Top Cover Girl Factory Worker, Saleisha’s photos grace the walls of the apartment on the models’ return. Dominique confessionals that she herself is "the Saleisha of this competition." Talent- and looks-wise, sister, you couldn’t be more right. And Fatima and Whitney say as much when Dominique retires to the bedroom to rest. Dominique has been stealing Whitney’s food. Oh, that’s why Whitney dislikes her so much! (Am I the only one really, really hoping for a repeat of the Great Granola Bar Beatdown of Cycle 5? Liars.) Anya confessionals that she is confident, even while wearing truly god-awful red eye makeup that makes her look like an albino rabbit.

Mona Tyra reveals that if they "take a picture" they might last longer. Oh, so the models are going to have their pictures taken? What will they think up next?! The girls arrive at a park to be greeted by nutty old Paulina getting her picture taken. I love her. She introduces them to an Italian photographer named Francesco Licata, who will be teaching them the basics of photography. This is actually a great idea, especially for the girls like Whitney who tend to have trouble finding their light. After the ladies practice photographing each other, Ann Shoket (hi Ann!) appears and reveals the challenge: each model has five minutes to shoot film of Paulina. The challenge winner, who will be chosen based upon skill in dealing with their model as well as the proficiency of their final photo, will get 50 extra frames in the next photo shoot. Fatima, up first, seems to do a good job of directing Paulina without being at all pushy. Dominique, on the other hand, essentially just tells Paulina to do whatever she wants. Whitney is very complimentary, and while she’s not quite as strong in her direction as Fatima was, she’s still very confident. Oh, and Anya. Anya has a vision. And that vision involves throwing leaves in the air. Ann and Paulina critique the girls: Whitney took great photos and was great with her model, Anya’s photos either worked well or not even a little, Fatima took good pictures but was great with direction, and Dominique essentially sucked. Fatima wins her first challenge, and the 50 extra frames.

Back at the pad, Fatima practices her runway, while Dominique criticizes her. Even Anya can’t take Dominique anymore and walks away while she’s talking. Mona Tyra reveals that "they’re out for blood, but they’ll give you a taste of fame." Paparazzi? West Nile Mosquitos?  Ha! Apparently paparazzo is Italian for mosquito – you learn something new every day – and the ladies will be participating in a movie star-vs-paparazzi-themed night shoot. And you would not believe how Noted their Fashion Photographer is tonight! The girls will be posing with male models. Anya looks like a cross between Anita Ekberg and Madonna, and gets too modelly, not understanding the theme of the shoot. Fatima looks lovely but – admittedly – doesn’t know how to interact with her partner. But Nigel not only gives her direction before she starts, but allows her to look at her snaps before her final 50 frames. He didn’t do that for Anya, which…I mean, he really has a problem with her. Whitney is super-posy, but that might actually work for this shoot, and her makeup looks amazing. Dominique is really presentational as well, and I don’t know what’s going on. I understand what Jay and Nigel want, you understand what they want, but none of the models seem to. It just didn’t come across for any of them.

What’s Italian for "panel"? Tyra, Paulina, Miss J, Nigel, and Ann Shoket are sitting in judgment, but only Tyra is singing said judgment. For reasons known only to Tyra. Anya’s up first, and she looks absolutely unbelievably stunning. I mean, this is a Cointreau ad, or a spread in Italian Vogue. Of course, however, Nigel takes full credit for the photo – it’s only because he "knows her angles" from shooting her before that the picture turned out this well. Knowing her angles. Heh. Is that what the kids are calling it these days? Whitney’s up next, and she looks bored in her photo, and like she’s sneering a bit. Ann and Nigel complain that she’s not using her va-va-voom, which is kind of unfair, considering last week she was told to cover that voom up. (And her va-va’s, too.) Dominique at panel has once again topped herself with the crotch-length-tunic-leggings combo, and once again everyone jumps on her for it. And she is a full-on tranny in her photo. Tyra attempts to connect with her by revealing that she, too, is kind of a dude, and sometimes sees "Tyrone" in photos if she doesn’t keep her face soft. Fatima’s photo looks like a DeBeers ad to me. It’s very pretty, but it’s nothing special, and there’s nothing editorial about it. Dominique and  Fatima are the bottom two, but, despite what Miss J says, Cover Girl does not in fact "cover up the man in you," and so Dominique is sent home. And there was much rejoicing throughout the land.

Next week: the coronation of America’s Next Top Model!

Well, it’s about effing time. Bye-bye, Dominique! And incomprehensible little Anya is in the top three, despite NFP Nigel Barker’s best efforts. I think she’ll go all the way. You?   

Posted by:Jordan Hudson