Luc is spray-tanning, and his orange glow causes Sarah to be suspicious. She asks Scotty for advice, but even Scotty doesn’t spray-tan and doesn’t really want to hear about his sister-in-law’s dry spell. No one believes her, but when Luc pocket-calls her and she overhears what she thinks is her man getting his slut on, she somehow convinces Scotty to accompany her to the poolside cabana where she catches him… with his agent. Ruh-roh. Sarah flees the scene of the big stupid. Somehow she turns her problem into HIS problem because she is a magical Walker, and she accuses him of being the Portrait of the Artist as an Underwear Model. So he promises to do better, and then he proposes. Lesson for the ladies? Be a crazy lady, because guys love it and it pays off in DIAMONDS.
Nora finally has her big audition to be the radio call-in host for the “Dear Mom” show, but she has a serious case of the sads because she can’t just walk in and get the job — she actually has to compete against other people. She is inexplicably pitted against a Paula Deen lookalike with a PhD and a heap of published advice books for an on-air Mom Smackdown. Nora flails and flails until Kevin smacks some sense into her.
Up in Ojai, Kitty still can’t seem to remember where she stashed her baby, but she’s too busy running and flirting with Jack the hand(s)yman to remember. As wildly flirty as she is, at some point she does remember that her husband died, like, three weeks ago. So she blue-balls the plumber and hurriedly packs to get the heck out of Ojai and away from all its rampant exercise. Silver lining? She gets to call Nora for advice on the air, and Nora gets a chance to shine. And Nora gets on a roll too: She tells Kevin to go knock up his damn surrogate already and inadvertently talks Justin out of a rebound cheap booty call. After the glorious advice she gives Kitty, Nora gets the job! The Paula Deen lookalike comes to be dismissive and mean, but silver-tongued Nora gets her to confess that her children won’t even talk to her and Nora starts giving her advice.
Kevin is the big man in his one-man office, and it’s started taking a toll on his alone time with Scotty. But after Nora’s straight talk, Kevin is ready to procreate and get some love on. Only Scotty can’t do it. He is being c***blocked by guilt because he slept with someone months ago. Kevin is not interested in procreating any more. Oh, Scotty, how could you? Or rather, DAMN YOU, WRITERS!
Photo credit: ABC