Bunny rabbits. You thought they were cute and cuddly didn’t you?
Obviously this is not the case. Bunnies are apparently responsible for thousands of dollars worth of damage to cars parked at the Denver International Airport. A local station, CBS 4, reports that the USDA Wildlife Service has to remove hundreds of the destructive critters from the airport every month.
Apparently, the rabbits like to huddle under the cars to keep warm. Once there, these ferocious bundles of fuzziness chew on ignition cables. This damage can affect the entire car, costing a driver as much as thousands of dollars. And your insurance probably does not cover Acts of Bunny.
What is a driver to do? Mechanics suggest coyote urine spray for the underside of the car, since rabbits will avoid an area that smells of predator. You should not, however, go all Elmer Fudd and take a shotgun to these precious hooligans. That is frowned upon.
Humanity should not be surprised by this rise in rabbit-related vandalism. After all, pop culture has warned us for years about the dangers of these creatures. Take “Monty Python and the Holy Grail,” for example:
Back in the early days of the Internet, one of the first usenet groups was called alt.devilbunnies. This site existed solely to warn the world about the scourge of murderous rabbits. Devilbunnies.org continues the saga on the modern Internet.
If you still don’t believe in the dangers of rabbits, here is a series of clips from the 1972 horror film, “Night of the Lepus.”
And last, but not least, we have the warning from “Buffy the Vampire Slayer.”
The relevant, anti-bunny portion of the song comes at about the 0:35 mark.
You have been warned.