went back to the season once formula of sex, drugs and rock-and-roll that made me fall in love in the first place. Of course, I live vicariously through Hank, so I thrive when he decides to kick up the fun another four or five notches.

These Spoilers have had the time of their lives, and they’ve never felt this way before!

Previously… Charlie ruins, then saves Daisy’s career; Hank and Ashby share a tender moment over our favorite record producer’s long lost love that got away.

Hank rolls down the street in the Porsche, stopping outside a posh Beverly Hills home. He walks up to the gate, and when he gets no answer, begins to peek at the mail. The man of the house arrives and begins to shoo Hank away. He then spots the woman he’s been looking for and shouts for a moment of her time. This turns out to be more than the husband can take, so he takes his best swing at Hank, knocking him over a bush. His days of writing may be short, but his landscaping career seems to be taking off!

Later at the bar, Charlie speaks out to Hank about all the time he spends at Ashby Manor. Seems Charlie is a wee jealous of what a relationship the two have. Meanwhile, he spills that there’s only one more day of shooting Vaginatown and then he can sell the porno and swim in its massive profit.

Ashby Manor. Hank arrives to find Julian taking a random girl to town in a guest bedroom. Sensing Sonja may not approve of this arrangement, Hank takes a photo with his cell phone for posterity. Back at his place, Hank shows off the photo to Karen… who seems less than impressed. She suggests Sonja has an open relationship, but before he can retort, Karen shoos him off to pick up Becca from school.

Marcy arrives home to find her pad transformed into a porn set. Charlie says the last location fell through, so to finish on budget and on time, they’re finishing the last scene there. All Marcy wanted was a little warning. Daisy arrives and shows off the goods. There seems to be a waxing issue, and even though it wasn’t Marcy’s fault, she offers to help anyway.

Charlie wants to hurry the shoot along, but the director takes his sweet time. After all, the Sistine Chapel ceiling wasn’t finished in a hurry. Daisy’s ready to go, but the male lead is nowhere to be found… until Charlie uses his sixth sense to discover the male lead snorting with Marcy. He calls her out on her frivolous spending of the money on coke, but she places equal blame on his shoulders for investing in the porno. If she doesn’t willingly clean her act up, Charlie threatens Wishes on her, but only because Promises is out of their budget.

At the school, Hank’s shuffling through age-appropriate radio stations when Becca, Mia and a new girl arrive. Seems a reporter for Rolling Stone is shadowing Mia for a “Day in the Life” feature. Why they’re choosing her, I’m not entirely sure. As this exchange is going down, he spots the woman he’s been chasing and tries to talk to her. Hank tries to bring up Ashby, but she volleys back harsh remarks on Hank. She says the girl Ashby’s thinking of is a figment of his imagination.

Daisy is pouting in her car when Charlie gets in. Seems she loves porn only because she loves sex. So it’s all relative, eh? Because of Dirty Dancing and a quickie with her then-boyfriend, she also equates movies with sex. Daisy’s now jaded by the whole process, and even though Charlie has nearly gotten her to the top, she’s scared of what success may bring. He gives her quite the rousing pep talks, which in turn arouses her. Self confidence in tow, they go back to the set only to find the male lead suffering from a certain drug-induced dysfunction. The director calls for the stand-in, but when his fun part is less than satisfactory, Ronny sets his sights on Charlie. Marcy eagerly suggests he do it, if only because of the potential return on their investment.

Hank and his ladies are hanging out at Ashby’s. While the younger gals are enthralled by the musicians, Hank talks to Annika, who is doing her best to throw herself at him. Sonja shows up and promptly throws up. I, too, did not know the morning sickness lasted into the second trimester. He spills what he knows about Julian and she confirms the open relationship… much to his chagrin. Sonja’s staying in it as Julian might be her last chance at love. They sit down and Hank moves in to hear the baby kicking when Karen shows up seeing them in an “out-of-context” position. Sonja awkwardly slinks away. Karen’s ready to go, but Becca’s growing fond of her new musician friends. Annika reappears, bottle in hand.

Back at Casa Runkle, Marcy’s prepping Charlie for his shot. She does her best to get him good and ready. Once he’s properly motivated, Charlie emerges gets into it rather quickly. Marcy seems proud that she did good to and for her man. The director breaths a sigh of relief when he gets confirmation of a good take, then proceeds to give him an Arthur Hoggett-worthy “That’ll Do.” Marcy and Charlie embrace, sensing their foray into the porno world is coming to a quick conclusion.

Hank and Annika have their feet in the pool. It turns out one of her first assignments was a review of his first novel, which she promptly gave it her worst rating ever. She blames the personal issues in her life at the time. After dancing around it for many, many seconds, Annika suggests sex, and we quickly cut to another bedroom Hank action shot. One he finishes pleasing yet another woman, she quietly requests a glass of water. Hank departs for the kitchen when he runs into Ashby exiting his own room. Awkward conversation ensues… that is, until Mia emerges with that devilish grin on her face.

Is Mia turning 18 anytime soon?

Next time on Californication, Ronny haggles with Charlie on a price for Daisy while having to deal with Marcy’s spiraling coke problem. Meanwhile, Hank and Karen talk to Justine Bateman about Becca, which leads to yet another Hank conquest. Also, WTF Damien!

Will there ever be an end to Mia’s gallivanting ways? Can Charlie’s big porno gamble really pay off? How much longer can Hank’s “lay of the week” last (not counting next week, of course)?

Posted by:Brandon Millman