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There’s a part of me that wants to think that the record producer in Californication isn’t representative of how they all act. In Los Angeles, sadly, I believe Lew Ashby is only the tip of the iceberg, so how convenient that Hank Moody of all people should land gainful employment with that guy.

These Spoilers have been to Hell and back in the slam van… take it easy on them.

Previously… Charlie gets fired, Hank gets hired and then there was Trixie, the hooker with a heart of gold.

Hello Sunshine! Hank emerges from the bedroom ready for a little morning delight, but all Karen wants is to tell him about her upcoming day. Before the fun can begin, Mia arrives to take Becca to her first day of private school. While Mia, of course, looks hot in her outfit, Becca can’t quite pull it off. Then again, catholic school and the Goth lifestyle don’t really mix. They’re all gonna laugh at you!

Up in Mount Olympus, Hank suffers through what has to be the worst death metal ever. And it’s old death metal, too. Lew Ashby is there to “produce” and thinks very highly of himself but not of his “artists.” All Hank wants is to gain the insights into Lew’s life, what with it being his first day on the job. Lew begins to pontificate on his mystery woman when who should show up but Trixie! It’s good to know record companies will pay up for whatever services the artists need… even if it means high-priced hookers.

Charlie is enjoying a coffee and trying to land work when he runs into Daisy, the waxed chick from last week. She scored herself a job, but isn’t too happy about the “amateur” aspect of it. Charlie tells her to stand up for herself, but before he can go into full-pitch mode, her “job” arrives in the form of a full-size van.

Our favorite agent is in way over his head as the production is about to begin. He introduces himself to the director while trying to angle himself as a potential producer/partner. The director could care less as he’s about to commence shooting. On action, she goes down on the guy, and it’s only now that Charlie realizes what he’s into.

At Sonja’s house, Karen attempts to go over details of the bid when Julian, the creepy boyfriend, appears out of nowhere. He asks for Karen’s wrist and proceeds to read her energy… and rather accurately, I say. She seems weirded out by the whole thing. That makes two of us.

Hank’s painting Trixie’s toenails and making up for lost time. The chemisty between these two is just fantastic. Even though she’s on the record company’s dime, she proposes a little fun for Hank only. He stalls, which gives Trixie the opportunity to ask why he never called back after the last time. Maybe it was because he was shaken down for cash last time around? The big bad lead singer comes in for Trixie’s services, and since she’s on the clock, obliges.

At school, Becca enters the lunchroom and makes a beeline for the only other awkward kid in there, complete in requisite emo garb. The boy makes it known he’s only at the all-girls school because he’s been suspended from his regular school. They bond in their own weird way… what with the common love of Guitar Hero.

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Back in the van, we’ve progressed to full on action and Charlie’s loudly wondering when it’s going to end. He laments to Daisy why she’s settling for van action when she herself said she wanted more for her career. The director takes about all he can before he kicks the two out, spelling out o-u-g-h-t. Sans shirt, Daisy is offered Charlie’s jacket while he tries to ascertain where they are. I’m going with the obvious answer and say three blocks from where I live.

Hank’s banging on drums, so it seems he’s found his new high. Lew wonders why Hank didn’t take Trixie up on her offer, but Hank turns it around wondering about his woman that got away. Out of nowhere, Trixie storms away from the bad job the lead singer is/was doing to her. The singer comes out quickly (hee!) and when he disrespects Trixie, Hank tackles him. It’s a regular battle royal until Lew presents his shotgun.

Apparently not content with one offer, Trixie propositions Hank once again. Lew wonders why Hank is turning her down, even though he’s with Karen now. After words are exchanged, including a smartass remark from Hank, the two men metaphorically whip ’em out and engage in a good old-fashioned wrestlemania. Speaking of Karen, she arrives in the middle of the first round and Trixie catches her up on all their previous shenanigans. Karen is shocked to learn how much Trixie actually knows of her and Hank. Meanwhile, the fight continues with Hank stopping only long enough to find out Karen got the job.

Later that night, Hank tucks Becca in and they trade stories of their respective days… how he inadvertently pissed Karen off and how she’s instant messaging her new Goth friend Damien. In the bedroom, Karen stops Hank’s advances because she’s having issues over what he did when they weren’t even together. Really, Karen? I can’t imagine what you did with Bill was any better, no matter how legal it might be.

Hank, was it really worth it to get back together with her? Sheesh.

Next time on Californication, it’s a Moody dinner party and everybody’s invited! I don’t think their house is big enough for all the drama. Also, Hank proposes?

Is Hank a glutton for punishment for putting up with Karen’s wild mood swings? Can Charlie turn his wannabe new client into a new star? When are we going to get more Mia action?

Posted by:Brandon Millman