Like its obvious inspiration, “Cheer Perfection” reeks of contrived drama. Within the first few minutes of tonight’s episode, head coach Alisha reminds the audience that most gyms don’t allow for parents to sit in on practice, but they do at Cheer Time Revolution — which is code for “We only got our show because we let these henpecking mamas in the room.”
So what happened tonight? Alisha was prepping CTR’s Youth Silver team for a big competition in Texas, which meant she wanted to revamp the entire routine in basically a week. The bigger the risk, the greater the reward? Seems like poor coaching to me. Why not just choreograph a technically impressive routine from the get-go?
The first half of the hour, however, focused on the team moms and their drama. There’s discord amongst the mothers, you see. Team Mom President Andrea (You know, the one who actually tells her daughter Kylie “No one’s every going to marry you and you’re gonna live in a house full of cats” when she notices her make-up isn’t right) doesn’t have the full support of all the moms because there wouldn’t be a show if she did.
The moms who hate her want to impeach or something, while Andrea threatens to remove a mother as Team Mom if they’re not performing to her standards. How moms become Team Moms is unclear because it really seems like all the moms are present.
Andrea decides she needs to appoint a vice-president to help keep these unruly women in line, so she names Chris, Abby’s dad, as her second-in command. There’s some drama from one of the moms who asserts, “I don’t let any man keep me in line,” somehow making her feminist stance look petty because she’s only doing it to get under Andrea’s skin. So, yay women’s lib.
There’s some other drama with Alisha’s kids, who behave like monsters and don’t get punished, but it’s resolved within five minutes so, like, why bother. Another mom, Mandy, is a charming woman who calls out, loudly, all the kids mistakes as they make them. At the competition, her daughter Olivia is the only one who makes a mistake, which means her karma came back to her daughter, thereby proving to Olivia that the universe is as cruel as her mom.
As for the competition itself, there’s very little drama. Shows like this always lose a bit of energy when it comes to the performances because their too cheap to license the music, so the performances fail to impress because, to us, they’re not being performed to the music they’re intended for. So anyway, everyone looks fine, but who knows? The team takes first place, so, good for them.
“Dance Moms” may suffer because it’s so ridiculously scripted and over the top, but “Cheer Perfection” fails harder because isn’t dramatic enough or entertaining enough. It wants to be, but it sadly is not.
Did you tune in for the Season 2 premiere of “Cheer Perfection,” and, if so, did you enjoy it?