Chuck has faced a thousand threats, but nothing is more terrifying than meeting the girl who broke his heart all those years ago. Well, maybe needles, but the girl is a very close second.

From the deepest recesses of my soul, I’m spoiler.

Remember a couple of episodes ago when Sarah went through the hell of having to pretend to be a yogurt-slinging wannabe actress in front of a high-school rival? Chuck gets to experience something hauntingly similar when he runs into Jill, the girl who broke his heart when she dumped him over the cheating scandal at Stanford, and then jumped into bed with Bryce Larkin. She’s now a big-shot biochemist who will be presenting at an international conference — a conference where Chuck was called to fix the network. He, of course, lies through his teeth that he’s a wildly successful computer entrepreneur, then beats a hasty retreat — but not before he flashes on Jill’s boss, Guy LaFleur.

Said boss is French, and therefore obviously evil. OK, maybe not, but he’s suspected of making a bioweapon and shopping it around to the highest bidder. General Beckman orders Chuck to cozy up to Jill and look for more flashes. The CIA does try to cushion the blow a bit by giving him a fabulous cover identity and a restaurant full of CIA sycophants. Of course, Chuck nearly blows it by verbally dope-slapping Jill for abandoning him when he needed her most, but he recovers and the night goes well. Until, of course, Jeff and Lester drive by and blow his cover. Sigh.

Jill wants nothing to do with him after that, but Chuck manages to work his magic on her and talk his way into her room — and her kisses. He declines to turn on the bug he was supposed to plant. While Sarah and Casey are dressing him down for that, he flashes on a guy posing as room service and going up to Guy’s room. Chuck is left in the van as Casey and Sarah chase after scary guy, which is normally a good idea, but in this case… not so much. See, the bug got activated remotely, and Chuck can’t resist the urge to eavesdrop on Jill’s phone call to her snotty ex-roomie. What Chuck doesn’t realize is that the bug transmits as well as receives, so his commentary comes over Jill’s phone. She’s freaked.

Of course, she’s even more freaked out by the news that her boss is dead — thrown out the window (and on top of the van) by scary guy. Casey whisks her to Orange Orange headquarters and gets the scoop: Guy wasn’t a bad guy, despite having an accent. He realized the company they worked for was building a bioweapon, and he and Jill were attending the conference to reveal information about it and to reveal the formula for the antiviral serum that would cure it.

Chuck doesn’t want Jill to endanger herself by presenting at the conference, so Sarah goes in her place to draw out the assassin. It works — he sets off the bioweapon and runs for it. Sarah follows and shoots him — only to discover that he was a CIA agent. Meanwhile, Casey and the scientists in the room were exposed to — and are now dying from — the virus. Chuck goes to Jill for help, and reveals that he really, really is working with the CIA. He volunteers to make the antiviral in the room, not realizing that would entail injecting the poison into his bloodstream and then drawing large amounts of his own blood. He asks Casey to take his blood, but Casey is in bad shape and drops the needle, shattering the vial. Chuck tries to improvise — maybe the antivirus is in his saliva! He lays a big wet one on Casey, who is too weak to resist. Fortunately, Jill appears with a HAZMAT suit, a new vial, and the knowledge needed to treat everyone. Chuck gets a standing ovation when he and the rest of the patients emerge from the room.

Back at Orange Orange HQ, General Beckman reveals that the CIA assassin Sarah shot worked for Fulcrum, and she wants to use Jill to try to draw out more Fulcrum agents. They won’t tell Chuck about this plan.

The Buy Morons
After Big Mike nearly chokes on a donut, Emmett decides to make everyone undergo safety training. Chuck enlists Awesome to teach the class. The Buy Morons react as you’d expect — Jeff and Lester use CPR dummies to act out the "pillow fight" the believe occurred when Sarah found out about Jill — but are brought up short when Emmett reveals they have to pass a written test or they’ll be forced to take a 30-hour remedial course on their own time and at their own expense. Morgan, Jess and Lester try to steal the test, but Morgan is caught fondling Ellie’s underwear, and besides, Awesome is keeping the test on him. They decide to copy off Chuck, but he’s busy saving the world. So they take matters into their own hands, getting Jeff to choke on a pen cap and then writing down the steps of the Heimlich when Awesome performs them on him. That’s one way to pass!

The Joy of Casey
Casey was ON FIRE tonight. A selection of my favorite Casey moments:

  • I was incoherent with glee at the sight of him in a shaggy wig, glasses and facial hair when he posed as the restaurant maitre ‘d. Joy!
  • The he reacts when Chuck gets pissy at Jill — "She exercised her First Amendment Right to dump you!"
  • The interrogation with Jill made my little heart go pitter-pat. Jill is weeping inconsolably, using up a boxful of tissues. Casey picks up another tissue to sweep them into the trash, then sprays the glass table with cleaner and wipes it down — all while questioning Jill.
  • Jill asks if maybe Chuck is a stalker. "Yeah, it could be a pattern with these losers," he says, casually getting up and walking to the two-way glass. "A pretty girl smiles at them, they get all infatuated. Seen it a million times." Then he winks at Chuck through the glass. Bwah!
  • When Casey realize that Chuck is going to try to deliver the antiviral load orally — with tongue — he gets even paler and more queasy. "I served my country with honor, Bartowski. Please, let me die with dignity!" Chuck smooches anyway, and then gets the news from Jill that it was useless. "From the deepest recesses of my soul, I’m sorry," Chuck says. Casey just growls.

Other highlights, thoughts and odds and ends

  • I love me some Iggy Pop, but I’m sorry, "Pumping for Jill" just doesn’t measure up to "Smack My Bitch Up" and "Tom Sawyer."
  • Chuck dives under a table when he sees Jill (who gets a slo-mo shot). "Can you tell me if the attractive, brown-eyed, slightly egg-heady brunette with the extremely cold heart is still here?" Hee!
  • Chuck gets a bit snippy with Sarah — he calls her a robot, says he can’t turn off his emotions like she can. "Are you done feeling sorry for yourself?" she asks. "Personally I’d like another 10 to 15 minutes of pathetic self indulgence, but duty calls," he says with a sigh.
  • Dear Jill: Chuck is adorable. Why oh why would you ever dump him? What were you thinking?
  • Pardon me while I reveal my shame, but I’ve quite liked Jordana Brewster since The Fast and the Furious and D.E.B.S.
  • Awesome sees the Buy Morons playing with the CPR dummies and says "What’s wrong with you?" "I drink too much," replies Jeff. "My parents had impossibly high standards," says Lester. Good to know!
  • Yvonne got to use her real accent! Huzzah!
  • When Chuck goes to Jill asking for help with the antidote and claiming to be with the CIA, Jill is incredulous. "Chuck, you really need to get some help." " I am the help," he respectfully replies. That he is.
  • Chuck doesn’t realize that Sarah is still watching Jill, and is therefore listening to everything he and Jill say to each other. That’s going to get ugly soon. 
Posted by:Sarah Jersild