dexter season 5 michael c hall harrison 'Dexter' recap: First BloodThe most important thing about this episode is that a large portion of it takes place under a bridge, in one of those only-in-Florida sex offender Hoovervilles. Obviously, it was endlessly fascinating and awesome, and there should be a whole show about those things somewhere. Anyway, now that Julia Stiles is living out loud, she goes completely postal and tracks down the bastard she thinks was Boyd’s accomplice. Right before she shoots him, however, Dexter stops her, as he had already kidnapped the guy the night before and noticed that his state-issued sex offender anklet would have rendered him unable to leave the molester bridge during her captivity. So the real guy is still on the loose, and Julia Stiles is determined to find him, even though Dex refuses to help her. I’m sure that’ll go over great for all three of them.

Harrison scratches another kid at Mommy and Me, and the other moms accuse him of being a psychopath. Dex overhears them and kind of puts the verbal smack down on them, but it was kind of weak sauce. Even Sarah Walker can do better than that, and Sarah Walker is a moron.

There was also more of LaGuerta and Angel’s marital issues stupidness, but those for the most part got resolved for now. What’s important is that they brought Robocop himself, Peter Weller, into the show, which is great, even though it made no sense — Robocop’s on the take? So IA needed LaGuerta to try to have sex with him? In a co-worker banging sting? No f***ing clue, but Quinn gets to the guy and offers to pay for his legal fees if he investigates Dexter for him. Robocop complies.

A lesbian tattoo artist who looks like a bizarro version of Mary-Louise Parker hits on Deb, which turns out to be meaningless, but later Deb tracks down the Santa Muerte brothers to a bar. We’ll have to wait until next week to see how that pans out, however.

And, lastly, there was a shirtless Masuka in a cheetah-print thong. And two corpses full of maggots. Still deciding which was my favorite.

Photo credit: Showtime

Posted by:Zap2it Partner