Okay, I usually hate Thanksgiving episodes because they’re frustrating when everything goes wrong. With Gossip Girl, however, I crave all these setbacks and conflicts because the drama is the gravy that makes everything that much more delicious. Bring on the gravy!
Spoilers stuffed into the cavity of a large, buttery bird.
Part of the episode is bittersweet because we get a flashback to Thanksgiving last year: when Blair could smile, B and S were BFFs, Blair’s dad and Dan’s mom were pre-running off, Nate was faithful to Blair, Dan’s crush was unrequited and Serena let alcohol get the better of her. Oh, what a difference a year makes — well, except for the liquor. It does have preservative properties.
Fast forward to the present and we get one uncomfortable moment after another. Let’s approach them systematically:
Fight #1 – After Serena confronts Blair about hooking up with Chuck, Blair gets all catty and snipes back, "Nothing hurts so much as sleeping with the best friend, right, S?" Ouch. As Serena puts some iodine on the scratches, she gets uninvited to the Waldorf Thanksgiving.
Unfortunate Occurrence #1 – Blair’s dad Harold decided not to come home for Thanksgiving, even though that’s their "thing."
Fight #2 – Blair and her mom have a very quiet blowup at the dinner table when Blair discovers that Eleanor had actually called Harold to tell him not to come and to not even call.
Unfortunate Occurrence #2 – Miserable, Blair eats a huge freakin’ pie. Of course, the only way to do this is to purge between servings … I was never a really big pie fan, but I certainly lost my taste for it watching this process, no matter how artfully it was shot. Was this the most dramatic, tension-filled music ever, or what?
Unfortunate Occurrence #3 – Nice guy Dan decides to save the day and invite the van der Woodsens to Thanksgiving. Despite lying about not feeling well, Lily gets roped into attending, which will be interesting, considering Allison, her former nemesis is back at the Humphreys.
Fight #3 – The Archibalds have the stiffest meal together, and the mom keeps trying to guilt trip Nate, who finally gets fed up and leaves the table.
Unfortunate Occurrence #3 – Lily reveals that she once had a horse named Rosewood, which, perhaps not so coincidentally is the name of one of Rufus’ songs for this band. But that song was about his wife Allison’s special sent of rose and sandalwood right? Right, dad?
Fight #4 – Now that the secret is out that Rufus and Lily used to date, there’s no holds barred with the revived love triangle. Words are said. Allison claims that Rufus and Lily had an emotional affair (even though she had a physical one). Somehow, Lily is the odd man out at the end of it all.
Unfortunate Occurrence #4 – Howie Archibald overdoses on painkillers, is found by Nate and is rushed to the hospital.
Reconciliations #1, 2, 3, 4, 5 – In her time of need, Blair calls Serena, who of course offers support. Lily shares fries with her kids a dirty diner. Eleanor apologizes to Blair and reveals she’s depressed because she just got divorce papers from Harold. Nate makes a manly effort to reason with his mom and then tells his dad, "We need you." Dan and Jenny sort of make a truce with their parents and play their traditional touch football game.
– All is right with the world for now, except … Where’s my Chuck???
– There’s nothing wrong with Peking duck on Thanksgiving!!
– Flashback Eleanor warning husband from her latest male model: "Not this one, Harold. We have to work together."
– Eleanor to Blair: "Why don’t you run upstairs and change into something a little more enchanting?"
– Eric to his mom: "You’re supposed to be with family on Thanksgiving." Dan: "And Nicolas Sparks is hardly family."
– Dan: "I’m adult-napping you."
– Eleanor sent Blair/Harold’s traditional pumpkin pie down to the doorman. That is just cold.
– Dan after the Rosewood comments: "Raise your hand if you’re over 30 and acting really weird right now."
– Blair: "You know what’s really weird? There’s a garage door in the middle of your room. (pause) Is that Cedric?"
Your thoughts? Anything I missed?