Richardburgi_thomaswellington_harpersisland_240 I know that I say “it’ll get better” every week, but this week I don’t have to anymore. This marks the official episode of when “Harper’s Island” gets better. The resident King of Spades is what I would consider the first major death because it’s a main character and it happens at the freakin’ wedding rehearsal. From here on out, the show is good. I just wish the writers had gotten us to this point around episode 2 or 3, instead of, basically, episode 6.

Ten of Spades (summary)
Henry gives Trish the morning off from wedding stuff (awww) and she and her father go for a bike ride, only to stumble across some One-Eyed Willie-type booby trap and be chased by a vicious dog set on them by a creepy Phantom-of-the-Opera woodsman. It’s a real bonding day for Trish and Thomas. Henry gets left with wedding decisions and he manages not to completely panic and be completely cute in the process. Malcolm spends all episode lying to his friends about Booth, because he’s a giant douche. Henry goes to the church to find Rev. Fain and finds a dead raccoon on the church altar. Sheriff Mills and his deputy eventually drag Reverend Fain’s body (parts) out of a nearby pond.

Nine of Spades (key players)
Turns out Jimmy and Sheriff Mills are breakfast buddies; Abby’s world is all askew. Later, she stops by her dad’s house and finds out he’s crazy-level obsessed with John Wakefield (and possibly Wakefield still being alive). JD and Madison become mischief buddies with fireworks and then Henry finds a firework near the raccoon carcass. He tells JD they’re done, but JD says he has “one more surprise” for Henry. Thomas confesses to Trish that he doesn’t trust Henry, so Trish drops the “Katherine sleeping with Richard” bomb. Ouch. Malcolm, Sully and Brooks look for Booth and figure that either he left with the money or whoever killed the guy on the boat got to him. They decide to tell Henry that Booth went back to the mainland.

Eight of Spades (who died)
Thomas Wellington goes to the Big Business Deal in the sky

Seven of Spades (how they died)
The head spade that went missing in the first act went off in the third act… right into Thomas’s skull. Abby turned on the lights, which released the head spade from the chandelier DURING the rehearsal ceremony. Yuck.

Six of Spades (gruesome scale)
Not so gruesome in this episode, 2 out of 10.

Five of Spades (hope you die next)
Sully and Shane were alternately barely and not-at-all in this episode, but I still don’t like them. Malcolm tried to melt my cold, black heart by crying over Booth’s grave, but I still think he’s pretty crappy, so him too.

Four of Spades (favorite lines)
[after a vicious fall off her bike because of the booby trap]
Trish: Wait… how’s my face?
[Ed’s note: I add this line because I was all set to make fun of Trish… until I realized that the day before my wedding, I’d be worried about that too. Hee.]

Sully: I want to tell you something. I never had sex with Trish.
Henry: …I know.
Sully: I just wanna make sure. Because back in the day when you guys were broken up… I tried. A couple times. And she rejected me flat out.
Henry: …She told me.
Sully: Well, you are marrying one helluva woman.

Three of Spades (best scare)
The whole ending is fantastic. The wedding rehearsal (with “Here Comes the Bride” in the background) is juxtaposed with the Sheriff dragging body parts out of the pond (with creepy music in the background). There’s a shot of the head spade in the chandelier, the tension builds, and then THWACK! Excellent job, show.

Two of Spades (lead suspects)
There really aren’t that many viable suspects, when you think about it. The women aren’t strong enough, and the groomsmen and Cal have no motive. That leaves us with Henry, Jimmy, the Sheriff, Shane and the maybe-still-alive John Wakefield. I really don’t want to believe it’s Henry or Sheriff Mills, so I’ll keep my hat in with Shane and Jimmy. Though I would enjoy the twist of two killers working together and one being a female.

Ace of Spades (weekly death roster)
Cousin Ben: this was no boating accident
Uncle Marty: bridge to tear-in-halfia
Reverend Fain: someone should’ve given him a heads up
Kelly Seaver: you hang in there, buddy
Lucy Daramour: what a little firecracker!

Hunter Jennings: he lost the face-off
Joel Booth: he’s got a leg up
Thomas Wellington: what a splitting headache

Queen of Spades (wha???)
They finally mentioned Lucy and all it consisted of was “I thought she left?” and “She did.” Then at the rehearsal, apparently they’re expecting her back for the wedding. Le sigh. Not exactly what I was hoping for and it came 2 episodes too late, but I guess it’s better than nothing.

Jack of Spades (sorry)
Sorry about the late post. We had some high winds that knocked out power, so I had to wait until it came back to do my recap.

Who do you like for the killer?(surveys)

Posted by:Andrea Reiher

TV critic by way of law school, Andrea Reiher enjoys everything from highbrow drama to clever comedy to the best reality TV has to offer. Her TV heroes include CJ Cregg, Spencer Hastings, Diane Lockhart, Juliet O'Hara and Buffy Summers. TV words to live by: "I'm a slayer, ask me how."