Tvpartyw607 Newlyweds might just be the happiest people

on Earth. Well, after lottery winners. And people recently released from prison

— although parolees have a better grasp on the future than either of the other

two. Regardless, there’s a certain joy that comes from watching love and

unbridled optimism in the face of overwhelmingly negative odds. And that’s just

what you get with Here Come the Newlyweds Mondays on ABC. So if you’re a fan

of couples who have no idea what they’ve gotten themselves into (or you’re a

licensed divorce attorney), call your married friends — we’re partying like



Setting the scene:

Once you’ve walked down the aisle, marriage

tends to look a lot like any other day of the week, so let’s focus on

re-creating that magical day when you and your parents spent $50,000 on cake

and clothing you’ll never wear again. You’ll need a makeshift altar with all the trimmings (perhaps an arbor or a trellis

replete with fake flowers and ivy), along with someone to pose as a minister

ready to bond two people in holy matrimony. Next to the preacher, have your

big-screen TV set up to watch the show. Set up some white plastic chairs with

ribbons of tulle tied to them for those who are willing to witness the mayhem.

During breaks in the action (aka commercials), have contests at the ready to

test the knowledge of the couples in the crowd. In fact, there’s a Newlywed

Game board game with more than 600 questions that you can use and then give away as a party

favor to the smartest couple!



Wedding-appropriate, of course. Guys should

wear nice suits or tuxedo T-shirts, while the ladies

can go with summer dresses and ridiculous wrist corsages. If all else fails,

wear a catering outfit and carry a tray.


On the menu:

The menu is one of the toughest parts of

planning a wedding: He wants ribs; she wants braised tofu. So let’s skip the

entrees altogether and serve shrimp cocktail as an appetizer and wedding cake

for dessert! Don’t forget the bride and groom characters on top.


On the hi-fi:

Love and Marriage by Frank Sinatra, If

You Wanna Be Happy by Jimmy Soul, Band of Gold by Freda Payne, This Diamond

Ring by Gary Lewis & the Playboys, A Church, a Courtroom, and Then

Goodbye by Patsy Cline.


The showstopper:

You can get round-trip airfare to Las Vegas from anywhere in the nation for less that $300. So we suggest

that you pony up that money — plus a little extra for a hotel — and take a

secret vote to decide which single couple should hop on a flight and get

hitched immediately at the Little White Chapel.

Posted by:Michael Korb