On “How I Met Your Mother,” the gang helps Barney fulfill the perfect week in order to forget about their terrible one.
Let’s break it down, shall we?
Barney’s Perfect Week: Barney imagines himself being interviewed by sportscaster Jim Nantz while awaiting his fate at his place of employment. Jim Nantz says Barney’s an icon, and damnit, he’s right. Barney is. He’s great at one thing, and it’s sleeping with numerous hotties. Sadly, Barney’s professional life takes a beating, and he might get fired by the end of the week. So what must a guy do to continue his good fortune/forget about potential unemployment? Pursue pursue pursue!
On Night #1 and #2, Barney deems success with the first 2/7ths of his perfect week. On Night #3, he goes “small boobs” and it’s after his third conquest that he realizes he’s onto something. Definition of the perfect week: seven nights, seven girls, no rejections.
On Night #4, Barney gets “over the hump,” as Jim Nantz eloquently puts it. By Night #5, trouble brews. A big merger falls through at work and Barney feels the brunt of the pain, but all is well, because Ted helps his bro out, picking the dumbest-looking girl in the bar for Barney’s No. 5.
When Night #6 rolls around, Barney makes an appearance at Ted’s apartment and tells a fib about his latest hump: Tavern on the Green, Swedish model, you know the drill. But the the truth comes out eventually; when opportunity lurks, Barney can’t be irked. Instead, No. 6 is a drunk hairdresser after Barney has a classy lunch at a Staten Island Chili’s. Lily jinxes Barney’s perfect week by uttering the phrase-that-shall-not-be-said and even Jim Nantz takes offense!
It’s Night #7 and Barney is talking to beautiful blonde “third martini” girl when Yankees’ player Nick Swisher walks into the bar, throwing Barney off his game. See, no guy can compete with a Yankees player, not even a famed womanizer like Barney. Feeling an ounce of remorse for the Barnacle, Lily caves and adds one of her own plays in the pursuit of the perfect week, throwing herself in front of the blonde before she can talk to Swisher. It’s a success! Barney’s weeklong mission is accomplished!
The question remains: Will Barney get fired? After Jim Nantz — who is Barney’s choice (and very fake) confidante — disappears, Barney goes into his boss’ office to hear his fate. Of course, his butt is saved because let’s face it, he’s awesome.
Ted’s in the Toilet: It’s the start of a new college semester and Ted goes through the roll sheet for his architecture class, when he comes across an unfortunate name. Being the (slightly) immature twentysomething guy that he is, he thinks the name, Cook Pu, is a joke. But of course, we all know better. The name has to belong to someone, otherwise, where’s the comedy? When a shy, Asian girl responds each time (three) to Ted’s insistence that the name is terribly unorthodox, the poor girl ditches and drops the class altogether. By the seventh day, when MacLarens’ waitress calls out an order for Cook Pu, Ted thinks it’s his buddies poking fun, but there she is in the corner of the bar responding with a meek “Here.” Oh Ted, he’s never living this one down. Cook Pu, anyone?
Marshall and Lily’s Questionable Hygiene: Though they may be the greatest married couple on Earth, this episode raises questions — albeit a hilarious one — about their oral hygiene. While the two look for a suitable Ted&Robin/Ted&Stella/Ted&Victoria/Barney&Robin replacement, they reveal something that irks even the least hygienic person: They share everything. Hamburgers? Understandable. Drinks? Sure, why not. But toothbrushes? That’s a whole ‘nother story. The funny thing is, during the eight years Marshall and Lily lived with Ted, Ted had the mistaken belief that Marshall and Lily kept their toothbrush (yes, singular) in their bedroom when in actuality, they were using his all this time! And remember when he dated Robin? Let’s just leave it at that.
Robin’s Maybe Soulmate: Robin has a male sensibility when it comes to relationships. She isn’t needy and loves her space, but in a strange turn of events, the longer Robin waits for her “maybe” soulmate to call her after their date, the more she turns into the quintessential lady hidden underneath all that thick Canadian skin. Who doesn’t love a Robin in denial?
Highlights & Observations:
- “Let me try to Canada it up for you, eh?” — Lily to Robin
- “Respect.” — Jim Nantz to Barney
- “Barney’s whole life is a cry for help.” — Ted
- “Moustache” Pete Drexel was the only person to complete a perfect game and a perfect week. Next on Barney’s list: take up baseball.
- Jim Nantz’s sports terms can be applied to picking up women.
- The perfect week is all about teamwork .. and Nick Swisher.
- Barney is inducted into the Hall of Game. Bets on who’s next?