himym rabbit of duck 320 'How I Met Your Mother': Rabbit or duck?Sadly, that is not Barney Stinson’s real number. On the Super Bowl and on “How I Met Your Mother” we got to see Barney hold up his phone number, requesting women to call him. As perhaps you did, I tried to call that number (come on, he’s Barney). The lucky few who got through Sunday heard a message from Barney, but many others got bupkes.

But I’m taking away from the funny, aren’t I? There was definitely funny to be had, and it only began with Barney’s getting texts and phone calls from an infinite number of women and certainly progressed from there.

For instance, it was duck season! (wabbit season!) It took someone else to point out to me how Ted’s picture of a duck could possibly be construed as a picture of a rabbit, but once I turned my television sideways I totally understood.

Happily, the explanation of how Don could be a duck and not a rabbit was far more easy to understand. I think we’ve probably all felt repulsion toward someone we eventually began to like, or loved someone for a while whom we eventually realized that we truly ought to be repulsed by. I’m not saying that I accept those two parts of the brain are next to each other (damn it Jim, I’m a writer, not a doctor), but we’ve all experienced that change in how we see someone.

That understanding, however, didn’t help me answer the ultimate question – why would Robin want Don to ask her out? Outside of the fact that I’m available in the real world, aren’t there people in the “HIMYM” world who would be far better for Robin? There have to be. I have to assume that just about everyone is a better choice than Don. Just because the man doesn’t wear pants doesn’t make him a duck. Yes, Donald Duck doesn’t wear pants, but as I recall Winnie the Pooh’s rabbit friend, Rabbit, doesn’t wear pants either. By the end of the episode, Robin had flipped from possible rabbit to definite rabbit to certain duck on the man, but I’m hoping that the relationship doesn’t head anywhere. I respect anyone who does “the naked man,” but the naked man doesn’t necessarily make a good match.

Speaking of bad matches, how could Barney not find himself satisfied with any one of the women he met via the ingenious distribution of his phone number? I get that he felt as though he shouldn’t waste his time on a 9.85 when there is a perfect 10 out there, but shouldn’t he have given the pretty-close-but-not-perfect girls his best? Didn’t they deserve their time with the Barnacle? Or, more realistically, when he knew that he had an infinite number of women coming his way, couldn’t he have turned off his phone for an hour or two? Isn’t that why voicemail was invented?

And then there was Ted. Ah, Ted. How did Marshall and Lily possibly forget to get Ted a wife? It was complete genius on their part to get Ted a girl from Barney’s phone, but I may have gone with the bullfighter. Seriously though, I certainly expect more of Marshall and Lily than to completely forget an obligation like that. If they want Ted to have someone so they can all double-date, shouldn’t they put some time and effort into it and not go with Barney’s castoffs? Do they really want to be saddled with a Barney castoff as their fourth for all eternity? I should think not.

Odds and ends:

  • Barney pretty clearly gets our quote of the night, “I’ve enlisted Ranjit’s services as my personal driver because for the next week I’ll be sleeping with hundreds of women and I don’t want to take the subway because, you know, germs.”

  • I could totally go for a scotch like Robin’s.

  • Teddy West Side? I don’t think so.

  • Who doesn’t love Ranjit? The man is a duck (Ted style, not Marshall style).

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Posted by:Josh Lasser