We’re just hours away from the next episode of “Lost,” entitled “He’s Our You.” That there is a pretty confusing title, I’ll be the first to admit. It’s like ABC suddenly hired Yoda to come up with episode titles. “Ah, young Shephard, return to the Island you must.” Because let’s face it, not even a 900-year old Jedi Master would surprise Jack and company at this point.

But in actuality, the title refers to a line spoken in the episode. Those of you spoiled on the episode know who says it to whom, but people like me sense spoilers a mile away. And that’s when the fan quarantine happens: we go fetal, cover our eyes, block our eyes, and start singing Geronimo Jackson songs until the spoiler goes away. I mean, that’s how I roll. I can only assume everyone else is as awesome as me.

But let’s break this down a bit further: “He’s our you.” The best guess is that one of the Left Behinds speaks this phrase to one of the Oceanic 6. Why? Because the Oceanic 6 wouldn’t give away their identity by identifying themselves as anything other than a Dharma Initiative member, and speaking this line to Sawyer, Juliet, or Miles doesn’t make much sense. Furthermore, it’s a stretch to think anyone on Hydra Island circa 2008 would say this line, since again, the phrase denotes a contrast between two clearly defined groups.

So, that leaves the best options as the “you” being Jack, Hurley, Sayid, or Kate. What would the “you” mean? Let’s explicate each option. Cuz we’re cool like that.

  1. Jack: “He’s our leader that has the best intentions at heart, but usually leads us into a trap while sporting crazy eyes.”
  2. Kate: “He’s the guy that continually insists he’s coming with us.”
  3. Hurley: “He’s our rock, our moral center, the guy that keeps everyone’s spirits up. Also, he loves him some Dharma ranch dressing.”
  4. Sayid: “He’s the guy who’s gonna make your taciturn booty talk.”

I love the idea that the last option is true. I can see a scenario in which someone from the Arrow, someone with extensive coercive skills, is summoned in order to make the Hostile talk. In this case, Sawyer or Miles each have an opportunity to utter the line, “He’s our you.” But that’s just my take. Be sure to take the following poll and let me know who you think “you” is.

A few quick things before I end here today. One, there are a lot, and I mean a LOT, of spoiler-tastic news flying around the interwebs concerning the end of Season 5. I won’t tell you to only visit this site if you want to stay spoiler-free, but I will tell you that I’m ever vigilant in keeping this site safe for people who don’t know anything about the show other than what’s happened through the last episode. Not only is that a general house rule, but to me is the only way to truly appreciate the show: would New Creepington have been remotely scary had I previously known Cabin Christian was there? Course not. There’s a time, place, and audience for such spoilers, but this is not that place. This place is death. And by “death” I mean “safe.”

Secondly, in keeping with the spirit of safety, I encourage people to stop and think before posting their comments here for the rest of Season 5. I’ve noticed a slight uptick in overall angst and nastiness in the comments section. A lot of it comes from a pure place of passion, but as we get closer to the end of Season 5 and “Lost” as a whole, I am sensing a general tendency for people to metaphorically dig their nails into their chair as the show moves towards places that are confusing, confounding, or simply moving in a different direction than they anticipated.

Result? A lot of cathartic release on comments that sometimes come across as combative. As many places as there are to find “Lost” spoilers, there are ten times that many in which people can anonymously call each other names and attack their theories. While I’m not suggesting group hugs here, I would say that the central mysteries of the show still have many possible outcomes. Just because someone doesn’t adhere to your theory doesn’t make either of you “wrong,” unless one of you thinks that “Lost” is a show about Fraggles. That actually IS wrong, sorry.

Bottom line: this is not a place for me to speak on high authoritatively about WHAT THE SHOW MEANS. It’s a place where I try to promote intelligent discussion that ultimately doesn’t take itself too seriously. (See: Fraggles.) And I’m damn proud of the community that’s gathered here in this microscopic corner of the online “Lost” universe. And I’m going to ensure as best I can that it remains as user-friendly as it is (hopefully) insightful about the show we all love so much.

Ryan also posts every 108 minutes over at Boob Tube Dude. He invites you to join the hundreds already in Zap2It’s Guide to Lost Facebook group. He also encourages you to subscribe to the Zap2It’s Guide to Lost Twitter feed.

Posted by:Ryan McGee