Today’s Dirty Laundry: We scour the Web for the best dirt. So you don’t have to.

Sean Connery received this inexplicable award over the weekend at the 4th Annual Bahamas International Film Festival. I have no idea what this is supposed to be. But hey, congrats there, 007.

Memo to producers who want their movies to make money: Don’t cast stone-faced Daniel Craig with frozen-faced Nicole Kidman again. Both films pairing the implacable stars ("Invasion," "The Golden Compass"), WERE LIKE TOTAL DUDS.

Oh, sure, Jack Bauer‘s a model prisoner. CLICK HERE for details. In other words, the dude’s not crying like wimpette Paris Hilton. But don’t forget, Bauer did time in a Chinese prison, where his captors didn’t let let him cut his hair or shave for, like, a year. This is cake compared to that.

Amy’s babbling, wandering around in her underwear, without her eyeliner. But she has great taste in bras! Even so, Mumsy wants Amy Dear to ring ‘er up. Click HERE. As if things aren’t messy enough, now Advice granny Joyce Brothers sticks her wrinkled nose in Amy Winehouse’s mother’s BUSINESS. Although she may have a point. Why release a statement to the press? Why not go knock on your daughter’s door? The paps see more of Amy than her parents do.

Think you have a body like Britney Spears used to? Then CLICK HERE!

Is Rosanna Arquette really DATING Paul McCartney? Dear God, no. Still, it could work. She’s already friends with Yoko Ono. But wait until Paul meets Alexis…. Yikes.

Celebutante rules to live by: Don’t date down. First, Lindsay Lohan dumped her Snowboard Sloth. Now Paris Hilton passes on Pizza Boy. CLICK HERE!

A movie that lets you see the world through JOHN LENNON’s KILLER’s eyes. Wow. Pass the popcorn.

Is Joel Madden the next Angelina Jolie? Check out his Kid Ink scoop!

Photo credit: WireImage

Posted by:Elizabeth Snead