new girl 303 double date schmidt cece fox 'New Girl': 19 great lines from 'Double Date'

It’s all over for Schmidt on “New Girl.” As he thoroughly expected, the man’s cheating behavior catches up to him in “Double Date.” When first Cece and then Elizabeth (because Cece had her phone number) find out, Schmidt is left alone.

So of course he blames the annoyingly happy couple, Nick and Jess. Schmidt now wants to destroy that happiness, much as his own died a thoroughly justified death.

Also, Winston spent quality time with his cat and alone at a table in a restaurant. It’s probably for the best that he missed out on all the drama.

All of this drama needs to be lightened now with funny quotes from “Double Date.”

“Winston and Ferguson about to split some pasta!” – Winston, singing to his cat

“You know what would be nuts? If I brought my cat, Ferguson, as a date …” – Winston

“Sounds like a gravel driveway in there.” – Nick about Jess’ elbow

“My bro and my ho!” – Jess, when Cece barges in on Jess and Nick in bed

“I’m going to stand up. You’re going to see my penis. When I walk out, you’re going to see my butt.” – Nick to Cece

“I see this ending badly. I see this ending very, very, very badly.” – Schmidt

“This is author Toni Morrison … I am … Well I think you’re a woman!” – Winston

“Are we finally going to do no-kiss sex?” – Jess

“Jess, you know so many ‘Spaceballs’ quotes!” – Nick

“Nick is cheating on Jess. Apparently they met at a gas station. She’s older. Much older!” – Schmidt, covering his own cheating to Cece

“If I get another ticket, they’re going to make me wear eyeglasses.” – Nick

“I hate to do this right now, but if we don’t sit, we will lose this table.” – Winston, at an awkward moment

“I don’t know … I don’t know you!” – Cece to Schmidt

“I’m just realizing that I don’t have any cash on me.” – Schmidt

“Who still has minutes on their phone?!” – Jess to Schmidt

“You broke my heart. Mail me my mouth-guard!” – Elizabeth

“Should it take the rest of my life, I am going to break you two up.” – Schmidt

“You’re afraid of pears?” – Nick to Jess

“I believe horses are from outer space.” – Nick
“I believe that too!” – Jess
“OK, good.” – Nick

Did I miss any? Let me know in the comments if I did!

Posted by:Laurel Brown