Attired in a slightly blousey white dress with lace sleeves, Paris Hilton looked like the prettiest angel in the Christmas pageant during her Larry King interview on Wednesday (June 27) night.

The party girl usually known for never doing anything when she can overdo stayed on message that she’s going to mend her ways. She refrained from accessorizing with a small cross necklace and made no mention of undergoing a jailhouse religious conversion, nor was a newly acquired prison tattoo on display. When pressed by Larry for her favorite Bible passage, she didn’t have one handy for recitation. Not even "Jesus wept."


Paris began her Reformation Tour buttering up Larry by calling him an "icon." She then detailed how she’s spent the last 23 days: 23 hours a day in solitary confinement (with an hour for showering and phone calls home), bologna sandwiches and orange juice for lunch, mystery "jail slop" for dinner.

Showing a bit of unintentional humor, she revealed that the lack of privacy in jail didn’t really bother her since it was "nice to be away from the flashes" of the photographers who follow her when she’s out in the real world.

All in all, do away with the phone calls and add in some alcohol and she may as well have been interred at the Big Brother house.

One thing 23 days in jail doesn’t add up to though? An hour of worthwhile chat show conversation.

By the half hour point, Larry had drilled down as far as he possibly could. Having shared the motto that got her through the past three weeks ("Don’t serve the time. Let the time serve you.") early on — and in between reading from the essays she wrote in prison — she didn’t have much else to say. Sticking to her story that her original DUI arrest came after she had imbided one margarita, she blamed her lawyer for driving on a suspended license and being given jail time rather than community service.

That "illness" that almost got her off-the-hook early on? Claustrophobia, which she managed to deal with the second time around thanks to letters from fans (including soldiers in Iraq), journaling, meditation and visualization exercises.

What’s she on medication for? ADD. When Larry tried to push her on how Adderall (which she’s been taking since she was 12) is a serious prescription drug, she brushed it off, seemingly unaware that it’s straight amphetamines.

When asked what quality she dislikes most about herself, Hilton replied, "When I get nervous or shy my voice gets really high."

Clearly under legal advisement not to say anything negative about anyone, Paris expressed concern for her neighbors who may have been disturbed by the ruckus outside her parents’ house the night of her release, claimed that the paparazzi are "just doing their job," and wouldn’t say a word against former frenemy Nicole Richie, momentary pal Britney Spears or even Lindsay Lohan.

Wanting to set the record straight that she is a business woman with money of her own, the model/actress/best-selling author/reality show star repeatedly said that she wants to help people and has a laundry list of causes and charities that she wants to get involved with, although there doesn’t seem to be a timetable for making any of it happen.

Of course, that doesn’t mean she won’t ever attend parties or red carpet events in the future.

"I’m an Aquarius," Paris says. "We’re social people."

Posted by:Brill Bundy

Brill Bundy has spent her entire career covering TV and pop culture. This is what happens when your parents try and limit your viewing habits to three shows a week. Likes: seasons with no more than 13 episodes, anti-heroes and binge-watching. Dislikes: when cartoon characters make out, when TV shows name check their titles, drawn out premieres and finales. TV words to live by: "If every porkchop was perfect, we wouldn't have hot dogs."