take the money and run bustamante 'Take the Money and Run': Someone actually cracks under the fake pressureSo the premise of “Take the Money and Run” is that a pair of people get a briefcase with $100,000 inside. They have an hour to hide it anywhere in their city. Then some real investigators have 48 hours to find the money.

If they find it, the investigators keep it. If it stays hidden, the pair keeps it. The rules of the investigation are that the investigators get access to the pair’s cellphones, any receipts they acquire during the hiding period and the GPS coordinates from their vehicle.

The premiere pair were the Bustamante brothers Raul and Paul in San Francisco. They drove around to a bunch of locations, called a variety of people as decoys and ultimately buried the briefcase in Lafayette Park.

After the hide the money, the investigators treat this as a real investigation, which actually surprises me. They decide that Raul is the Alpha and Paul is the weak link, which turns out to be totally true. Paul is a terrible, terrible liar and he’s getting so nervous. Dude, relax! This isn’t real.

Then the investigators call the guys’ mom and she just gives up the third brother’s address. The investigator straight-up says, “Paul and Raul can’t come to the phone, I’m calling for them. They want to go visit their brother Rob for his birthday, but they don’t know his address” and she just gives it up. You’re a fortress, mom. Well done.

Meanwhile, the other investigators are playing Paul like a violin. He’s a weak-ass mama’s boy and he is crumbling on the fake heist TV show. Nut up, dude! Get it together. Seriously, I hope this guy watches this and feels deeply shamed.

He absolutely cracks under the “pressure” because he “wants to go home.” It’s 48 HOURS! For $100,000! And you have like 18 hours left! What is wrong with this guy? He now straight-up just tells them where the case is. W.T.F.?!

This is embarrassing. The investigators find the case with 17 hours to go. Because stupid Paul gave them up so he could go back to his mama’s house.

Posted by:Andrea Reiher

TV critic by way of law school, Andrea Reiher enjoys everything from highbrow drama to clever comedy to the best reality TV has to offer. Her TV heroes include CJ Cregg, Spencer Hastings, Diane Lockhart, Juliet O'Hara and Buffy Summers. TV words to live by: "I'm a slayer, ask me how."