The troubled young mama provided one of the most priceless moments in “Teen Mom” history with her jail time “negotiation” with her exasperated attorney. Jenelle refuses to commit to her recovery (“12 Step is not my fantasy, mom!”) and would rather serve up to 45 days behind bars than give up weed on a drug-monitored probation.
There’s only one problem, and her name is Ke$ha.
You see, although the probation officer offers Jenelle the opportunity to serve only 16 days, it commences three days before a Ke$ha concert in Raleigh. Let’s break down the magnitude of this event:
- It’s not just a concert, it’s Ke$ha. And Jenelle is “obsessed with this girl!”
- She got “all these feathers” in her hair!
- She has second-row seats!
- She invited Tori to join her!
Wait: Back. It. Up. Tori is only Jenelle’s former roommate, the drumstick-waving chick with whom Miss Feathers got in a vicious fight. (The indoors one, when their boyfriends joined the fray.)
Jenelle’s jail negotiations come to an abrupt end when her probation officer orders a random drug test, which she failed (she failed the last one, so might as well party more, right?), and is arrested on the spot. And the karmafest continues when Jenelle’s mom, Barbara, refuses to bail her out of jail. “Sit in jail and pay the price,” screeches Jace‘s fed-up grandma. Maybe Jenelle will use the time (tik tok on the clock) to get her priorities straight?
Jenelle wasn’t the only one hanging out with a lawyer in this episode. Leah and Corey finalized their divorce, although Leah protested until the last second. Corey, who usually has the patience of a saint, was flabbergasted when Leah saw his new truck and blamed it for the failure of their marriage. (Maybe their court docs read “truck” instead of “irreconcilable differences”?) The twins’ papa suggested what we’d been screaming at the TV: that “you screwing Robbie before our wedding” might have been the real trigger. Sorry, Leah, cheating is always going to trump truck.
Kailyn, who is flipping out with jealousy over Jo‘s new girlfriend, retaliates by scheduling a conference lawyer to alter their custody agreement. You see, Vee posted a picture of the new couple with “tipsy” in the caption — dated on a Friday night, when their son Isaac was with Jo. Even though grandma was babysitting, Kailyn — conveniently forgetting that Isaac has been known to attend day care while he’s in her care — argues that their son should’ve been with her instead. And she plays the “underage drinking” card, too. As usual, Kailyn doesn’t bother to tell Jo what she’s up to, so that’s going to be a fun surprise when he’s served the legal paperwork.
Chelsea is the only mama whose drama didn’t center around legal issues — although her father, Randy, must daydream about filing a restraining order against baby daddy Adam. When Aubree‘s grandpa finds Adam’s stuff in Chelsea’s garage, the two men have a huge confrontation, with Randy somehow forcing him to remove it. (Where was MTV? Why were we deprived of this delicious scene?) Although Chelsea says she pays the rent, it must not be much or how else would her dad have the authority to kick out her boyfriend?
Adam strikes back by being two hours late to his daughter’s birthday party and ignoring Chelsea. Rinse and repeat.