biggest loser season 12 trainers nbc 'The Biggest Loser' recap: Average JoePreviously: The contestants got re-teamed, in many cases with different trainers, and freaked the **** out. Anna was awesome and told people to man up. And Ramon’s new teammates voted his girlfriend Jessica out, leading to dirty looks and simmering resentment!

We enter with the contestants sitting around and talking about the latest elimination as Ramon wipes a tear from his eye. And thanks to Tweeter HL, who pointed out that Ramon is wearing FRENCH BRAIDS! I know! I don’t know how I missed this last time. If you ever wondered whether French braids on a 350-pound man would be the worst, you now have your answer. (Yes.) I think he’s also wearing a big cubic zirconia earring. Thank goodness we didn’t also catch a glimpse of his maxi pad. Ramon tells us that Jessica’s elimination is a nightmare. They relied on each other, and “related” to each other. Ramon totally DID have sexual relations with that woman. And they’re in looooove and stuff. I hope this doesn’t mean there’s an ill-advised proposal during the finale. That’s my least favorite part of this show, always. Anyway, Ramon is pissed that it was his very own teammates who sent Jessica home. I mean, them and everyone else, really. John owns up to the fact that Jessica’s elimination had to do with her being a threat, and Vinny thinks that’s a terrible reason to send someone home. Joe wants to make amends with Ramon, but Ramon is not having it. Joe says that he thought he was trying to keep the Blue Team together, but in fact may have destroyed it from within. A house divided! This is gearing up to be very much like a Lifetime movie, French braids and all.

We cut to Vinny and Ramon in one of their rooms, talking **** about Joe. Ramon is wet around the eyes, with tears of both sadness and tears of rage. He wants nothing to do with his teammates, and certainly doesn’t trust them. Ramon wonders if Joe has been a game player all along, and vows that he will play the game too. He says that, with their chicanery and skullduggery, Joe and Becky have awoken something in him. Let’s hope that something has a more dignified hairstyle.

The next day, Sami meets up with the trainers before they can get to their teams. She tells them that this week, each team is going to have one person represent them on the scale. The decision about who exactly that person will be will be made by the trainers at the weigh-in. The trainers tell their people, and there is a great amount of trepidation. John looks particularly concerned, in part because the Red Team is down to just him and Bonnie, and you know Dolvett is not going to put Bonnie on the scale. Since the Red Team only has two players, if they lose the person with the lowest percentage of weight lost will automatically go home. Those bitches need to do whatever they must to ensure that Dolvett is not taken away from my TV screen prematurely.

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