might not go down in history as an all-time classic, great, television show, it is however great fun. All of these contestants are so suspicious of one another, it’s kind of silly. I actually half think that some of them (I’m looking at you, Paul) might believe their own shadow to be the mole, were that physically possibly.

The game started off in Santiago, Chile tonight and the group was instantly divided into two squads — 9 goal oriented individuals and two who like to fight uphill battles. As some of the folks figured out, the uphill battle team was going to have to do something manual (run, walk, hop, skip, etc.) to get up the monstrous hill and to the statue of the Virgin Mary, but the others wouldn’t.

Now, the goal oriented people did have to make it to the top, but they’d get to ride a gondola to it (after playing a game of soccer to get the gondola tickets). If the goal oriented people made it up first, they would get $35,000 added to the pot, but if the uphill battle folks made it first (they were riding a bicycle built for two), they’d gain an exemption.

It wasn’t quite that easy though. The chain repeatedly fell off of Mark and Kristen’s bike, and the little kids that the goal oriented team were playing against whooped them. The kids picked up 14 goals (including the own-goal score Craig made), to a big old goose egg for our heroes following 20 minutes of pitched battle.

I know that soccer isn’t a big sport in this country, but the team was embarrassing. I was embarrassed for them. If you were watching, you were embarrassed for them. There’s just no way they should have played that badly.

The weird thing of it all wasn’t Bobby’s inability to run (I have no idea why Bobby can’t run, but apparently any sort of exercise is not his thing), it was the fact that after getting the gondola tickets, the group couldn’t make it to the gondola station as a single unit. Liz sat and took off her shoes, Bobby couldn’t run, and neither could Craig, and some people thought there were shortcuts to be taken. Inexplicably, they didn’t bother to make a clear decision, together, as to what they were going to do and consequently they lost the race to the top.

One certainly couldn’t pinpoint if the mole was in the group playing soccer, because about half of them seem vaguely incompetent. They couldn’t do anything right.

Things did get better in the next town they visited, when they had to find cute little clay piggy banks hidden all over town and slingshot them into an arena where they’d be caught in a blanket (I do like how original and utterly weird the tasks are). All the pigs had to be launched in the slingshot before a clay pig-maker had time enough to make a dozen little piggies of her own. It all kind of made me hungry, after all, who doesn’t like a few pigs in a blanket?

Alex and his team did really well finding pigs, mostly because he spoke Spanish and could ask people where they were. Bobby, Kristen, and Craig on the other hand were kind of embarrassing. It wasn’t Kristen’s fault, and Craig did his best, but Bobby spent his time being pushed around in a wheelbarrow (it was meant to carry the clay pigs, and apparently Bobby felt like he was a part of that category).

If you ask me, the group, as a whole, didn’t do that badly. They managed to get 28 pigs, out of a possible 50 maximum, safely into the blanket. Compared to how they had been doing to this point, and considering the fact that Bobby and his team didn’t bring any pigs back to try and slingshot, 28 pigs is pretty solid.

With the events for the week done, the true game began. Alex left, possibly by accident, his Mole Journal in Bobby’s room. It was, almost certainly, a setup and Bobby bought it, figuring Alex was just that dumb.

It’s possible that Alex was lying when he said he left it there on purpose, but I just can’t believe he’s that dumb. I mean, that would require him to be really, really dumb. Wouldn’t it? If the producers got people that unintelligent to play the game there’s not much of a point in our trying to figure out who the mole is, and so I’m saying he was definitely playing Bobby.

In the end, Liz was the low scorer on the quiz this week and the group was made far stronger for all future weeks of the game, at least where physicality is concerned. While Liz seems like a nice lady, unlike Craig, I won’t be missing her.

Thoughts and questions:

  • Craig on playing soccer against kids — "I have a niece and nephew and they accidently hit me in the balls every once in a while."
  • Nicole is still ridiculous, her saying she could kill Paul in his sleep and not leave any "forensic evidence" was pure stupidity.
  • Question 9 on the quiz tonight asked if the mole was transported in a wheelbarrow the majority of the time during "When Pigs Fly." I guess there’s a point of view that would lead one to believe that Bobby could be the mole (he has destroyed the group’s chance at money repeatedly), but he would have to be the worst mole ever to be playing it that way.
  • I’m sticking with Mark as my choice this week. I know that halfway through their bike trip up the hill Jon offered Mike and Kristen a taxi for five grand and Mark said no, but that would have been a little too obvious of a way to sabotage everything. There’s just something about him that, to me, screams "mole!"
  • What do you think, who is the mole?

And that, as they say at The TV and Film Guy’s Reviews, is that.

Posted by:Josh Lasser