Ericadurousseau_survivor14_fiji_240Pre-Credit Sequence. As Thursday (Feb. 15) night’s Survivor: Fiji begins, the remaining Ravu tribe members are miserable and not because they miss the recently snuffed Jessica. No, they barely knew Absy McFlirtsalot, but they had more than a passing familiarity with water and they’d grown to like it. Instead, it’s four days into the game and they’re licking palm fronds for the occasional nourishing drops of dew or rainwater. Delirum is also on the verge of setting in. It doesn’t. Boo.

Fat city. Over at Moto, they’re full of complaints as well. They have too much food and they’re getting too much sleep and their pillows are too comfortable. Farts of satisfaction fill the air. I wish I were kidding about that, really I do. "We’re all thinking the same thing ‘This game is so vicious, it’s delicious," says Lisi. Between comments like that, her horse laugh and her Popeye impression, I’m kind of wanting to whack Lisi upside the head with a coconut.

Water, water everywhere, but not a drop to drink. The Ravus are rubbing sticks together, but they don’t have enough energy to get smoke, much less a spark, much less fire. Instead of water, they’re draining coconuts and slurping the occasional clam. Mostly, they’re napping and stumbling around camp wondering why Absy McFlirtsalot couldn’t do a simple puzzle.

A boo-boo or two boo-boos for Boo. Yes, things are pretty hoity toity for Moto, but Boo is good at creating his own obstacles. First he gets something in his eye, which seals right up. That doesn’t even contribute to him mishandling an axe and chopping up his finger and his knee. By the time Boo’s hammock collapses, it isn’t so much funny as predictable, like the third or fourth time you watch "Tommy Boy" in a row — Yes, fat man fall down. There is an upside, though: Dreamz notes that eventually, Boo will just chop himself to bits and save Moto an elimination.

While I was gone, why didn’t you make things not suck? Nobody at Ravu is particularly happy to have Sylvia back. For one thing, she’s missed several days of suffering. For another, she’s actually hydrated, since Exile Island was equiped with flint. And finally, they didn’t like her very much to begin with. She does have a habit of backseat driving even the most menial of tasks ("No, you fool, you put the lime in the coconut and drink them both *together*"). Who knew there was a right and wrong way to pass out from hunger? In a nice moment, Yau-Man uses a "Welcome back" hug to check Sylvia’s pockets and sack for the Immunity Idol. He finds something and the tribe is looking forward to voting the new girl out.

Andria_dre_herd2_survivor14_fiji_240Being on Survivor is pretty much a little bit easier than being homeless. So says Dreamz. Like most of his Moto bretheren, he gets on my nerves, running through trees grabbing piles of fresh fruit. Over dinner he brings up the possibility that they may have more food than some of the people watching at home. It’s funny to watch Dreamz’ less previously unfortunate comrades giggle nervously and then go back to gorging themselves.

What’s that over there next to the pineapple-shaped rock? Earl, Boston Rock and Erica wander the island looking for anything to eat. They climb mountains, go into ravines, but it looks like they got hosed. Salvation, though, was closer at hand. Right next to the camp are dozens of pineapples. The moist fruit yields tears and love. "Me and Erica are getting married now," announces Earl on a Vitamin C high.

Challenge time. Over at Moto, they may not have much sustainance, but their bellies full of the desire for revenge. But revenge is no substitute for energy and the challenge requires teams to canoe, collect crates and assemble a puzzle. The game has no real momentum but in the end, Ravu squanders a lead, Sylvia does a lot of yelling and Moto wins again. They get fishing gear and the right to send somebody to Exile Island, picking Earl, whose great achievement in isolation is killing a sea snake and leaving its corpse out as a warning for any others, not that he wanted to do it. "It’s like ‘Saving Private Ryan.’ You let that one go and it might come back for you later."

The ‘fro’s gotta go. So we’re all set, right? Sylvia is going home. Not so fast. Boston Rock see the chance to play Rockfather and holds a meeting with Mookie wherein they determine that despite being down one player with neither water nor food, now’s the time to start eliminating threats. For that reason they decide to play up Erica’s challenge frustration and they have a willing accomplice in Sylvia, who recognizes an escape hatch when she sees it. Only Anthony and Michelle decide that the original plan was a good one and that they don’t like Sylvia enough to do her any favors. Prepared to go his own way, Anthony predicts that if the vote goes to a tie, somebody’s head will explode.

Tribal Council. Nobody’s head episodes. Erica says she was just putting in her imput, not freaking out at all. Then Sylvia denies being a leader and suggests that the dwindling tribe hold an election for a new leader the next morning. While at least two votes go for Sylvia, Erica gets the rest. She’s the second person eliminated from the game.

Thoughts on the second week of the game? Found any favorites yet?

Posted by:Daniel Fienberg