Ah, l’amour. Ugly Betty advanced several romantic relationships tonight, but the one driving the centerpiece wedding wasn’t one of them.
Spoilers are Posh-tastic!
After a botched attempt covering up her relationship with Henry, Betty gets in a huge argument with Papi, who definitely doesn’t approve. Stubborn, angry and not a little hurt, she packs her rolly luggage and moves into Henry’s place. While I think this is a bit extreme (she only just slept with the dude!), what I can’t stomach is Betty’s refusal to attend Papi’s citizenship ceremony. That’s just petty and petulant and other things that don’t start with "pet."
But really Betty hasn’t been herself this season. She’s been mopey, whiny, deceptive, negative and an all ’round wet blanket. Luckily, Henry forces her to attend, and father and daughter make up. I was hoping that this would mark Betty’s return to her upstanding, cheerful self, but what with getting fired by a betrayed Daniel, I wouldn’t be so sure. Plus, there’s the whole doomed relationship thing still going on.
Wilhelmina was wearing her dragon lady finest this episode. Not only did she sleep with bodyguard Dwayne again the night before her wedding, but she pretty much thumbed her nose at Daniel, who had his hunches, but couldn’t prove it. Her only weakness was her miscalculation asking Posh Spice (Victoria Beckham), that limelight stealer, to be her maid of honor. That didn’t last long. As guest stars go, she was a’ight. Designer Vera Wang playing a bitchy version of herself was just odd, especially when she did a booty bump.
Anyway, after ignoring Daniel’s claims that Wil was cheating with the bodyguard, Bradford keeled over mid-ceremony. Yeah, he lives, but in what capacity? Does Wil still have a chance to get her claws in him?
Meanwhile, Christina‘s estranged husband Stuart (with an equally dishy Scottish accent) dropped in, whereupon we discover that he used to be a drunken sot, and so she just up and left him one day. They sweetly reconcile, doing the nasty in Fay’s sex hideaway, and Stuart reveals that he’s dying from liver disease (thanks alcohol) and only has six months to live since he can’t afford this $100,000 miracle experimental medical treatment. Christina, after rediscovering the nice Stuart again, is touched and vows to get him the money somehow.
Okay, because this is Ugly Betty land, we’re all wondering if Christina is getting conned, right? Could it be that obvious? I’d hate it to be such a cliched story, but what’s the alternative? She gets him the money, he lives and they’re happy? Where’s the drama?
Anyway, I saved the best relationship for last. I adore Marc this season. He’s finally accepted the real Cliff and displays a silly, yet sweetly jealous side at the wedding when Cliff makes his official public debut as his boyfriend. Marc doesn’t quite know what to do with his feelings and almost sabotages the relationship until Amanda, narcissistic yet loyal Amanda, points out his condition: "You’re looking past the outside and seeing what’s on the inside. You’ve fallen for an average man. You’re deeper than you think." And, without saying any words, Cliff accepts his flighty man back with a hug. Awww.
Some choice bits:
– Marc: "This wedding is so fancy, even Armani is wearing Prada."
– Wilhelmina observing Posh waving to the paparazzi, "We all know you’re strong enough to raise your arm."
– Wil dubbing the Meade siblings as: "The Dynamic Duo: Danny and the Tranny"
– Amanda: "I’ve got class coming out the pooper."
– Marc, after the second mention of his nipples: "Why the sudden interest in my boys?"
– Marc, observing Posh in a killer gown: "She made me feel tingly where no girl has ever made me feel tingly."
– Betty’s planned date with Henry: The New York Transit Museum.
– Amanda, upon seeing a suave Cliff: "Transfatty …"
– Amanda, singing "The Milkshake Song" in the church. Great acoustics.
Your thoughts about how this will all play out? Betty/Henry, Christina/Stuart, Marc/Cliff?