Previously on: Randy Orton
is king of the mountain as WWE World Heavyweight Champion, but Daniel Bryan
is the man the people want to see. John Cena
is still the star, though. Everyone else seems a bit lost in the shuffle.
The big news:
There’s not much of note. The holidays have arrived for WWE, giving “WWE RAW”
a heavy Christmas vibe. Christmas carol singing contests, Divas wrestling in sexy Christmas costumes, and evil Santa Claus vs. good Santa Claus are the types of things you see when WWE is burning time until the new year.
The Authority kicks things off Monday (Dec. 23) by handing out candy to kids in the crowd, setting up matches for the night and letting Kane do his old fire shtick, which seems weird with Santa hats involved. They also give Orton the night off, one week after telling him he needed to be a fighting champion.
The standout matches were the two six-man tag contests, starring the usual suspects
One of the few moments that actually furthered current story lines involved Bryan, who teamed with Cody Rhodes
, being bested once again by The Wyatt Family. Meanwhile, CM Punk
tangled with The Shield one more time, but he wasn’t alone. This time Cena and Big E. Langston
joined him. The backstage promo from the trio turned out to be the most fun moment of the entire show.
Odds and ends:
- WWE announced the impending return of Batista, which is coming Jan. 20.
- Santino’s cobra sock puppet had reindeer antlers this week. Elvis Cobra is still the winner.
- Santino and The Great Khali won the Christmas carol contest. They were terrible.
- Dolph Ziggler vs. Fandango competed in a Christmas present on a pole match … Seriously.
- Darren Young got booed out of the building for accidentally calling Austin, Texas, Houston.
- If evil Santa Claus won the Battle of Santas, Christmas is canceled. How is that not the main event match?
- FOX News personality Megyn Kelly would not be happy with WWE’s Good Santa Claus.
- One of the weapons in the Santa match was a toilet, which is gross.
- El Torito had a Christmas-themed bull costume, because why not?
- Bad News Barrett stole money from charity, what a nice guy.
- The Bella Twins, Natalya, Eva Marie, Cameron, and Naomi beat Tamina, Alicia Fox, Kaitlyn, Aksana, and Vickie Guerrero
- Sin Cara beat Curtis Axel
- The Wyatt Family beat Daniel Bryan, Goldust, and Cody Rhodes
- Fandango beat Dolph Ziggler
- The Usos beat The Prime Time Players
- Good Santa (Mark Henry) beat Evil Santa (Damien Sandow)
- Los Matadores beat The Real Americans
- Ryback beat Kofi Kingston
- CM Punk, John Cena and Big El Langston beat The Shield by DQ