“Survivor: Game Changers” featured one of the most edge-of-your-seat, nail-biting segments ever Wednesday (March 15) … And it had nothing to do with the game.

After a “Survivor” buff-drawing swap that rearranged the two tribes of nine into three tribes of six, the new Nuku tribe (Malcolm, JT, Jeff, Sandra, Michael and Aubry) were presented with a bit of a conundrum:

Like everyone on this game, they’re super hungry — so JT and Malcolm decide they’re going to catch a goat. Fine. But when they manage to actually catch one, it turns out the only reason they were able to is because it’s a mama goat who wouldn’t run away from her baby goat (a very small, very adorable, baby goat).

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So now they have two goats, and Sandra is like, “Yeah, cut ’em up.” She has zero figs to give, she’s just hungry. And we respect that — if you eat meat, that doesn’t really leave any room for outrage about what might be about to happen. But it becomes something entirely different when you have to do the killing yourself.

JT, Malcolm and Jeff are suddenly very upset at the prospect of killing a mama goat and turning her defenseless baby out into the wild to fend for itself — and let’s be honest, that baby goat was small enough that it would probably have died. So now it becomes a group discussion and vote, with Sandra arguing heavily in favor of food… And turning us all into Lex from “Jurassic Park.”

As Aubry points out, there’s a reason Sandra has been labeled a villain despite being the only two-time winner — though there’s definitely a “goat-eating GOAT” joke to be made here — and while we understand where she’s coming from (meat is meat), even farm boy J.T. is like, “Yeah, I can’t do this.”

Now, whether or not the tribe was actually, seriously considering killing the goats is debatable. But the segment was super intense, because it really seemed like they were considering it — which brings us back to the age-old question of what CBS would actually show on TV.

Luckily, in the end, they chose to let the mama and baby go and hopefully they lived happily ever after — and then, after all that, the Nuku tribe decides to eat one of their chickens. You had chickens the whole time? How was this even a debate?!

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…Oh, and Caleb got voted out. No big surprise there — he and Hali got screwed by the tribe rearrangement. When you’re outnumbered 4-2 and you lose the Immunity Challenge, one of you is probably going home. It’s interesting the tribe took out the big, buff dude instead of the tiny girl. It’s a fine strategy, because Caleb has a lot of friends on the other tribes, but early on, most tribes want to keep brute strength over players who bring other things to the table.

Caleb was never our favorite “Big Brother” or “Survivor” player, but it’s a bummer for him to get taken out of the game for reasons beyond his control — a medical evacuation the first time around, and now a tribe shuffle.

And so for a pretty run-of-the-mill “Survivor” episode, that goat segment was even more, which is to say entirely too, intense. Thankfully next week looks like a lot of fun — two Tribal Councils!

“Survivor” airs Wednesdays at 8 p.m. ET/PT on CBS.

Posted by:Andrea Reiher

TV critic by way of law school, Andrea Reiher enjoys everything from highbrow drama to clever comedy to the best reality TV has to offer. Her TV heroes include CJ Cregg, Spencer Hastings, Diane Lockhart, Juliet O'Hara and Buffy Summers. TV words to live by: "I'm a slayer, ask me how."